2005 年 8 月 6 日 星期六 【晴】

soooooooo tired...

i went to staduim station to meet jong hoon today.
and then we went to T&T, the super market...
we buy a lot of things... and then we take sty train to his home again.
and then......
we start cooking! so funny, i enjoy alot.
this is my first time to cook.
he takes viedo for me, haha...
and then... i'm ot very professiohnal in it, so...
it's overcook, i mean the chicken wings. but still very tasty.
his host parents, his friend all love my food, thanks god.
and then we ve desert too. so nice!
then we went to the china town festival. so good...

then... after all, i buy him alot of chinese buns, chinese dim sum for his host and him.
we had a very great day, today!
and then... we felt so tired, we just... seat at the park,
and then sat listenening songs from his mp3,
then i sang.. and he sang,
then we met a group of guys... they're very funny.
and then... we talk, and rest... nice nice...
and then he sent me back to the sky train station,
we go home.

then after back, i ve dinner,
and then.... me and aunt went to save on food, a big supermarket.
after i come back, i feel so tired already....
and then.....
right now, i saw darling's on line, but away then on line...
but no on talks to me... hummmmm... i say hi but... anyway...

i know that... i'm gonna miss my friendsss when they left...
=(

today, jong hoon say... he likes korean girl, and also hong kong girl.
i didnt say anything to him. i just smile.
i know he doesnt know any other hk girls, just only me.
if we keep like this, someday... he will fall for me.
perhaps he was just kidding...
and perhaps he doesnt mind to stay some distance with me,
coz... even it's just his culture... i think... it's not very good?
my darling's not here, so... anyone stay near to me, just makes me feeling like...
i really really miss my darling, but not the person who's staying with me currently.
you understand?
i can be very closed to everyone, boys or girls...
but if boys stay too close... i would just ... look him like my darling.
i got feelings, coz i miss my darling, but not with that person.

jong hoon, he's a very very nice person, and very match with me.
i'm with him, i feel very comfortable.
but when he stay close, i didnt reject him, coz he sounds like my darling,
he makes me feeling like he's ben, but actually he's not.
he's just.... another person.
he's like my real brother,opp ba, but... when all the feelings mix together,
i think it's quite strange. it's his korean culture, but not mine.
and i shouldnt stay close with him anymore.
na nun nu nul joa hae, na nun jong hoon opp ba joa hae yo.
but... nothing will happen.
coz, i know who i love in my heart, although this person's not right here,
and he has tonze of reasons , or excueses defensing for himself.

>>August 7, 2005 at 6:41:44 AM GMT+8

2005 年 8 月 5 日 星期五 【晴】

today...

workshop...
i was late to school...
coz... i set the wrong time for the alrm clock...
sigh... stupid girl...

anyway,
after the workshop,
then i went to the chapters, the very very huge bookstore.
and then... i found a very nice book, but i didnt buy it.
maybe ... later, when i'm free, i 'll ve time to read?

anyway,then i get back home,
ve instance noodle....
and then rest a bit, then i go out again,
i go downtown,
but someting wrong... then......... i spent totally 30 or 40 mins to and fro the bus station,
hummmm i lost smething on the way, the side walk.
then i look for it.... and.. i'm just so sorry that
make jong hoon wait for me so long...

then when i get there, jong hoon already buy me drinks, the ice-cuppcino,
i cant drink milk, so i didnt drink it...
then i buy the diet coke, and we watched movie together.
the movie is " must loves dong ".
very funny love comdy. i love this kind of movie =)
and then..... we just chat after the movie,
we talk about tomorrow, coz i'm going to cook chinese food tomorrow.
* guys plx dont misunderstand me and him,
we're just friend, and he's going back korean next sat.
nothing happened between us, and nothing's going to happen *
then we chat, take pics, then we went to mcdonald's, yeah~
coz i was quite hungry, i ve felit o' fish no chese meal =) heehee
then, we chat alot...
coz i m a bit worried about if he likes me, something like that...
then... he told me actually his friends re just... want to keep close with girls here,
dont really mean to lok for a girl in here. and he understand that's impossible.
and then... we talk alot about....... his life in korea, and i talk about mine,
and then... we talk about our opinion on relationship...
he thinks... there's no real friendship between man and woman.
oh gosh... i asked then... ok, you say we're friend, real friend, but now you say...
no real friendship between man and woman.
we both laugh... but... i was embarassed you know... i feel like i shouldnt say that out,
but i ve said it out so fast, already.
then he laughs... he's older than me, and we're from the same horoscope,
so.. i guess he knows why i feel embarssed....
then...coz i asked him what he thinks about long distance relationship...
then... he said when he was young, it's ok, but now no more...
then ok... i dont worry anymore... but then he said..... no real friendship...erh....
oh gosh... just scare me...
then... i say... oh... you're going back so soon...
and then... i try to change to another topic...
we talk about women... haha funny.
then sudenly we go back to the old topic...
he said... he can stay longer, 3 more moths if i want. just depends on me.
THIS TIME HE REALLY SCARE ME !!!
then i just look at him... i was shocked, then i start laughing... so embarassed...
he avoid me this time...
then after awhile... he say........ dont be serious on what he said...
okay... fine... just a bit scared me actually... what a big joke... coz i ve to really becareful
about that... i dont want any misunderstanding between me and my darling.
no more please~~~ i dont want darling to think the wrong way...
quite embarassed, man....
but fine, i dont worry for the strange feelings now,
co everything is clear now, and he knows i ve a boyfriend.
we're just friend, and then no more than that.

then he sent me to the bus stop.
and then we waited for long, but no bus... oh yeah~~
coz i went to the wrong bus stop.... shit...
one more street behind... eeeeee.....
and then...

on the bus...
some brazy white guysss get on,
they drink, they talk so loud, they're like the gasnsters,
and then they fight ... but they're friends... as a gropu around 7 ppl.
then i called darling... on the bus...
sounds like he's not very very busy...
so we chat for more than 30 secs,
he asked where i was, i said on the bus, but he thinks there's too loud.
yea of course, coz the guys were so bad on bus...
he asked if i miss him, of course yes!
he said... he loves me.... yea, me too...
i really love him alot....
i'm still in love with him...
so, when jong hoon asked me do i still love darling... then i just say.. haha why not?
i know what jong hoon thinks... but... like he says, i'm young, right?
haha anyway, i love my darling :)
so...... i respect him and myslef... heehee
yea, i didnt tell darling that i hang out with jong hoon today,
coz i know... it's nothihng gonna happen, so i dont worry about that,
actually i'm affraid that darling would mind me hanging out with jong hoon...
but now the fact is ... we're nothing, very very clear... right?
but do you think i should tell him later?
or... dont need to tell him? i dont want him feel bad, but really nothing happened...
but i think i've to be honest with him, right?
but... how about if he thinks the wrong way?
that even worse ? but i want to be honest with him... he's my darling,
my laogong... so... i should let him know, right?
and thenl.. do i need to tell him we all 4 went firework,
then we all , 4 ppl hand in hand together?
sigh... so complicated...

>>August 6, 2005 at 6:26:12 AM GMT+8

2005 年 8 月 4 日 星期四 【晴】

wah!

last night the fire work was soooooooo nice!
finally i went there with alesja, jonghoon and yang.

wah, so tired... after i come back home, i went to down town again,
we met at lodon drugs...
many ppl there... then we walk to the eng bay, quite nice,
good wealther...
then we sit on the beach and chat till 10 pm.
the firewrok is from china,
quite funny! coz we ve the national song before the firework.

after the firework
then... too much ppl at there, we cannot move... just... very very very crowed.
i dont want to get lost,
so, alesja takes my hand, and i take jonghoon's hand.
then yang takes alesja's hand.. we 4 walk together, quit fun.. hahaha...
many ppl doing the same thing.
then when we suck on the road,
then we start chating with the ppl we dont know on street.
the guys, i guess they're chinese canadian, they're so funny.
then we start kidding... and move again...
and then... when we 're released...
we got on the main street, not much ppl, not crowed anymore...
but, those korean guys didnt released our hands.
i dont know what to say... maybe they treat us very friendly,
so they didnt let us off.
then... coz they dont release... so me and alesja ve to keep holding hands.
we 4 keep holding till the last min i want to go to washroom.
i always signal alesja i feel .... not very nice, coz sounds quite strange..
but, i dont ve any feelings with jonghoon, although he keeps holding my hands,
and he take care of me when there was too crowed.

anyway...
then i wait at burrad station for 1.5 hrs,
4 bus pass, still cant get on..... and then........ actually i was at quite front of the line.
suddenly,
a very very very stylish and good looking guy came and talk with us, i mean other
ppl waiting for the bus... and me.
then,... a " very very long car", i dont know it's name,
but it's for wedding, or important ppl, or... whoever very rich...
then the driver stoped and asked anyone want to get in,
then... the chinese guy asked him, kidding with him...
then driver say $80 bucks, could be for 8 or 9 ppl.
coz we're all going to the same place, richmond centre,
so... i say i want to get in, coz i was super super tired....
then i say how much do i need to pay? coz i really want to go home right now.
*i ve presentation today.
then i pay $10 bucks... then experienced this kind of "car"
oh god, that chinese guy's never stopped his mouth and his act,
he acts really funny, like jim carry, he's very very stylish and good looking.
so... everyone in the car all is like his audience.
but i was sitting there, and falling asleep...
then he asked me to wake up and sang with him, drink with him.
then, everyone look at me, oh man i know he tries so hard to ask me stay awake,
coz he always ask me ques, or talk to me... but he's really "wu liao"
then i dont want to ans him or talk to him.
but... everyone look at me,
then i start dancing in the car with that hard beats of the loud sexy pop songs.
but he asks me want some drinks, oh no thanks... really thanks.
i know what he says to the other girls, he was kidding me that i hate him,
then i say huh? he says "huh?" oh excuese me, i say.
then he repeat me. fine i had no energy to play with him.
then when we get off,
ilucky that i ve 403 coming!!! dont need to wait for long! haha
and then i say thanks and goodnight to everyone of them =)
goodnight.

and then today the presetation should be very very smooth and nice,
but... the rquipment makes all the things worse,
the music cant played natually, lots of things come out without any ideas...
and then... i run out of time...
and i gotta stop.. i know it reduces my marks alot.
but i still feel proud of myself,
coz i did a really great job. and then... i know alot of students appricate my job.
lisa and joy, our teachers say... coz of the equipment, so... i cant finish my presentation.
but they really feel interested and wanna see my whole powerpoint,
so, on the coming monday, after the listening final exam,
they will give me time to finish my powerpoint, although it 's not going to affect my marks.
wow! so great! ^^
coz... i just want to present it, it's like sharing, not just for marks.
it's my fault, my respons to make sure everything will be running smooth.
it's me vent really marked on time, it's me not prepared enough on keeping time.
so... i feel so nice.

then...
breakfast, mcdonald's, happy meal again,
lunch, 5 pieces of small calafonia rolls, hummm coz pil take one off.
he' s really sick today, so bad.
ok... fine...

then yesterday i've up loaded all the pics on net in school already.
guys might go look around later.
and

when i get back home today,
i saw darling's message on msn,
ohhh... hee.
he say he loves me tooooo.
hum.....
i miss him.
does he miss me too?

>>August 5, 2005 at 4:43:44 AM GMT+8

2005 年 8 月 3 日 星期三 【晴】

hi,

the 2nd time to write... pc lab again.
shit... i didnt finish the baseball match then i get out already.
i come back to school, cannot find alesja.
i might not go to the fire work tonight.
i feel so tired and very very bad.
alesja didnt wait for me, she's left, she went to another places already... sigh...

i miss my darling so much.
his brother said, after me and darling get married,
then we would ve lots of time to talk everyday.
oh really? but.... isnt that something cant be changed no matter marry or not?
sigh...
i just love him, and i need time to compromise... those conflicts in my mind.

i miss my family, too.
but wehn i get back, i'll not be able to meet my friends here,
and cant ve donuts and cookies,
cant ve freedom...
but i can stay at the same time zone with darling,
and i can get back to my old friendssss, and i can be home again.

i love my darling!!!!!
i love my family!!!
i love my friendSsSSS~~!!

hummm
=(

aunt's back today.
hummm dont know how's she now.

i hope my darling 's fine...
i dont want him to be too tired or stressed.
i want him to take rest, not just for me,
i want him to rest and relax.... i dont want him just working... it's too much for him.
that's why i'm abit angry at him...
but... it's fine, i just want him to... take care...
i dont want him to be.... like that....
i'm not really angry at him, but i dont like him hurting himself.
and i want him to ve time with me of course, but that's not the most important thing for me.
i just want him being fine...

>>August 3, 2005 at 10:54:12 PM GMT+8

2005 年 8 月 3 日 星期三 【晴】

at school now,
no time for lunch, really busy busy and busy...

anyway,
just now i was talking with his brother...

today morning i called darling, coz i wanna let him know i'm going to firework tonight
and i wont come home... i think i should tell him about that.

but,.. he was bathing, then... after 15 mins, i called again,
i was so excited to call him,...
ut he switched off the phone already.
i was quite shocked about that... then after a few mins, i called again,
same.
i was a bit.... uhappy...

i think it's very un-respectful...... he shouldnt do that.
just 15 mins, cant wait for me?

then at school, morning class is in lab,
for modifing the presetation for smart board.

then, i come on line, and then i saw his brother,
i didnt know it's him, i said... you're so mean darling,
then i knew it's his brother, not my darling.
we've talk abit,
i understand what happened, and i know i shoulsnt get angry at him,
i know he's really tired and busy, and i also know why he 's doing this.
i know he loves me, i know i love him, too.
i'm not gonna angrty at him,
but i should lear...

ok, i cant write more now,
i got to go to meet my class,
we're going out for activity now.
so tired...

>>August 3, 2005 at 7:08:40 PM GMT+8

2005 年 8 月 2 日 星期二 【晴】

sigh....

super busy, man...

anyway,
i wanna say... this is the sec week darling hasnt day off.
what make that happens is himself... his options.
i dont want to care about what's his reasons,
coz he told me... it's the good money from dayoff.
then i asked... does he like money or need money?both. he said.
why i can talk to him, coz he came on line... hummm at least he came.
but you know that ... " at least" is always not considered.
i mean... well, that's better than nothing. AT LEAST, now, for me, it's true.
even i dont want it's true.... oh man... i ve to accept that.

i know, he's not a thoughtful man, of course he dosent, coz i'm not there.
he cant notice what's wrong with me,
he cant be bothered by an internet girl, maybe...

i wanna say, if next week, he's not gonna take a regular day off,
i'm probably angry at him.
he's not responsible for himself and me.
in my thought, rest is super important, and..
in his case, i dont ve any ideas why he can stand for that if he always feel so tired.
is money that attractive?
but, you know... he's tired, damn tired he still work for money.
if he's so tired, or just tired, he doesnt willing to pay attention on me, or talk to me.
he rathers go to sleep and eat.
unless i got mad at him.
it's so unfair.

i want to ask him...
if i were in sg, would him take a rest regularly?
not necessary , if he really wants to work ?
or, he would do that for his sake? dont need to be so great that he does that for me,
but just like others do, take a dayoff every week.
really, dont hide up, would he put down his work for awhile?

you know me, guys... i hate complains...
but my boyfriend makes me always feeling like complaints alot.
but i'd never mean to that...... what can i do?
he's making me feeling harder now.

i'm sure that he doesnt know anything here about me,
coz he'd never asked.
if i am a bad girl, i can date with lots of guys behind him, but he'd never known that.
so, now, anyone wants to date me? hahaha... kidding, i dont want.
i'm tired, but my brain 's still running, and i'm sensitive, smart... i feel bad.
i dont yell at him, it doesnt mean i dont feel wrong.
i say... i hope he knows i love him so much....
but i know he doesnt really understand i feel bad, even he sais he knows.
yea, i do, but i dont want to complain to him, i 'm tring to accept.
i know it doesnt work, but at least... i try, right?

if i were other girls, i'd already asumme that he 's cheating on me already.
is that true he has other girls? i said that before,
i trust him, but if i find out that's true, ok then.
no regrets at all.

i think.... sometimes, he's kindda selfish.......
he said i just cared about how i feel... no i'm not.
he said he's tring his best, and not going backward, he works so hard, just for
the future and me...... i know every men do, and he better has this thought.
i understand he need to work, but i just dont understand why you love someone,
but you dont care to ask, you dont care to know what's happening around her.
yea, he loves me, but he couldnt show me.
is he testing me or what?
he expects me to tell him everything? ok... fine... but.... i feel like i get rejected
more than being welcome.
these are all my feelings, negative, but i admit that i love this person so i dont mind
doing this kind of " consideration " for him, otherwise i ran away already.
you guys know me well or very well, if i 'm not in love with him at first,
he'd never be able to be my love. that's so mean... but like truth.
if he doesnt treasure my efforts, doesnt talk to me... then i really dont know what to do.

sometimes, i ask myself, is it me too much?
asking for too much? no, i'm not. i dont think so... certinly not.
but, i'm always... being nice to him, heehee.

anyway...
hope he would know i'm doing very hard for him, just for him, someone i love.

crazy works lately,... now is 8 17 pm,
i still vent started my home-job today,
aunt's back tomorrow...
you know, i dont want to cook tonight... terrence left me too much dishes and
pot, pan, for me to wash... i just cant stand for that, when i saw that,
i feel so sick...
and i found that we dont water at home now... he disnt boil any,
but drink all of them... holly...sh.....
ok, fine. i dont wash, i dont cook and i dont eat your food, no pro.
left all the stuffs to your funnky dad then. i dont care.
anyway, i'm not a mid, so i'm not doing that.
the kicten is super dirty and messy, sounds like after a big party,
but no parties at home today.
how lucky am i being able to see this kind of woderful spot of the world.

>>August 3, 2005 at 3:21:23 AM GMT+8

2005 年 8 月 1 日 星期一 【晴】

i'm eating dumplings right now...

today, i wake at 11 am,
then i go out around.... 12.
i thought.... libary is opened today, but not.

then i walk around, go to the lodon drugs,
then take sky train to waterfront to meet alesja.
anyway, today i walk nicer ^^ heehee... coz i practice more ^^ heehee
then,... i also wear my cute mini skirt...
and... many ppl look at me...
maybe i'm too colorful today.
and something which's ever really happened to me that happened today.
talk about that later.

then i met alesja, then we go mcdonald's. heehee
filet o fish no chesee time =)
then, we sit and chat, for fun, hahaha...
then we go to the chapters, the very very nice bookstore at downtown,
i think that's...... granvile with davie street maybe... anyway,
we had lots of fun at the book store, then we takes pictures...
and then... just hang around...
#1, alesja say i look nice at pics all the time.

ok, then we went back, we take 98 together, she drop off,
then i went to the super store to buy something,
and then, inside the store,
#2, an woman comes say... excuese me, your shoses looks so nice,
where did you get them? hahahaha hummm it's from aldo, downtown,
but you can get them in richmond center, too =)
then ...
#3, when i was taking some banana chips, a chinese man comes and say..
oh... do you need the paper? oh sure, thankyou... but he doesnt need to help me
at that situation, heehee..
then, when i get out, i was walking to the bus stop,
than man again, he says, hey... do you need a ride?
oh... no it's ok, i'm going to get on the bus =) thankyou.
re you sure?
yea, thankyou =)

hahaha...
i think that's mini skirt's power?
but my skirt isnt that short...

i miss darling so much today...
yesterday, i was talking with junming,
i told him that my friend( angeline) said ben 's not good...
then junming says... i should trust ben, yea i know, but i just feel not really good,
of course i trust him, but it doesnt seem nice, too...
but i could accept that.

anyway,....
i really miss him alot.
hope he's fine.

>>August 2, 2005 at 3:10:57 AM GMT+8

2005 年 7 月 31 日 星期日 【晴】

Last night,
not really last ight...

ok, i sleapt at 8 am today.
last night i was doing my power point, from around 2 am maybe.
then,... today couldnt wake up for the Gay Pride, at Robson... =(
i got up at 11am, then i eat 1-piece of bread, some chips, few piece of orange,
then i wash my clothes, hang them... then i rest for awhile, go out to look for
my friends,.... but when i was on the bus, alesja told me that she must go home.
hum,.... then i hang out by myelf.
so nice, i got a cheap skirt ( no that cheap at all) but on sale, around 70% off.
too hot,... i need a mini skirt. hee
if it's not on sale, i wouldnt buy it, coz after the big disscount, it cost $22 (includ tax)
i just walk for a while only, coz... i'm still practicing walking with the high heel.
so, i couldnt walk as my normal speed, you know i could walk quite fast, right?

last night, when i was doing my powerpoint,
at the same while, i was talking with my sister, miki.
i miss them alot.

however then,
angeline was.... not well, i guess..
and then she start talking with me.
she asked me why i'm so in love with ben, i thought she saw my nick name in msn.
she said... what makes me trust him so much,
she has the very strong feelings just as everyone do that ben is cheating on me.
i ve nothing to say actually.
she said even i'm so doubt, why still wasing my time on him.
he said he quited smoking, then i trust him, he said no time for games i trust him,
angeline thinks i trust him too much and i'm so innocent, too easy to trust ppl.
she means we ve too much problems, like age, distance, and time for each others.
she think it's extremely hard, which is for sure, i know...
she says... ben is not clabing my hand,
she asked me how do i know he's doing the same thing as i do.
hum,... i understand what she thinks, coz that's also my consideration.
sigh... i just dont know what to say anyway... maybe let say...
i know if i'm doing the wrong thing now, i'll still go ahead,
coz this is my willing and promise to myself. no one to blame, no regrets.
i know i will get really really hurt if the thruth is i am cheated eventually,
but... i should be fair to ben, too.
i dont know why jesus give me this charllenge.
if he gives it to me, that means i would be able to handle it with the strenth from Him.
last time,
i was really hurt, but... jesus was with me, so i can get over it, and being better off.
if ben is really lying....... then i can just say... ok.... and i really get hurt.
but it doesnt mean i really did somethihng wrong, and i must be brave.

on the bus today,
i cried...
i suddenly think of a song of eason chan,
the song describes the relahionship between the father and son through a byclcye.
when i sang , my memorry was floating in my brain, then my tears floot.
i thought of my daddy.... when i was a little girl... till now...
i remember every-years... christmas, chinese new year, or big events of lau's,
mom takes care of my sisters, then... only dad can bring me out sometimes,
i fellow him, i fel so great, i felt so safe....
every little pieces of memorries in my mind....
he teaches me so much so much.... not by words, but everything.
that kind of feelings... i couldnt find that in anywhere from anyone... except my mom.
he's always giving me, no matter what i want, he tries and tries to fullfill all of them,
even something he doesnt really can or want to do... he still do that , just for me.
i was so touched you know?
yesterday, miki turn on the webcam, i saw my paretns, they're getting old,
i'm not kidding... they're really getting old.
oh gosh, how long we still ve? life is just too short.... lucky that human ve 60-90.
but,... now... i really miss my parents.
i really want to stay with them......
then i think of darling, ben 's already hit the marry age. i love him, i want to stay with him,
but... i dont want to leave my family. and i cant ask ben to come. and i'm still too young.
my parents born and raised in hk... hk is their home, hk has the uncountable memorries.
they're not like me, i love go over the world... i'd plased to stay in anywhere.

i really miss him, but i really really miss my parents.
if you were me, i think you might choose your parents.
for me, it's hard.

just now, i called him, i didnt talk to him for long, just few mins...
the connection was so bad.... cant communicate..
i just tell him i really love him ... and wanna know if he's ok.
coz he's too busy lately... i'm a bit worried for him.
then hang up...
i'm not asking for more anyway, coz i know that's the limited already.
and i dont want to do that, too.

jesus, what can i do for my parents?
what can i do for ben?
what can i do for you?
plx tell me... how can i be brave?
i really do try my best......jesus... plx tell me.... what can i do?

>>August 1, 2005 at 6:41:11 AM GMT+8

2005 年 7 月 30 日 星期六 【晴】

i'm so tired today.

i hang out...
water front with alesja, then we went to robson street.
we went to chapters, the very nice book store...
then alesja takes bus to eng bay, to watch the fire work with michico, and other ppl.
then... we wait... for so long...
then we decide to walk... i walk to the banana republic to meet pil.
then we wait for taku...
then we went to ve korean food... dinner.
quite full.

then they go to meet up alesja, and...
then i go home by myself.

today is so weird...
it takes 2 hrs to home... it sucks...
i was wearing my new high heel sandles.
so... i was like... oh gosh.... plx... bus plx....
but you know,
at the broadway statin, the bus stoped.
and then... a mea, the passanger came talk to the driver,
what someone at the back room was heating the door or whatever.
police came, taked that man off, then the bus was stop for a few few few mins.
then... oh dear, my foot is pain...
osh....
yup, i brought this in aldo few days ago.
i just need the sandle, coz too hot here, i mean the sandle is too hot haha!
and then i just practicing how to waer the real high heel to walk nice.
coz you know... someday i need the interview,
and ... i just have to wear this kind of suck.

alright...
i saw lots of pretty things in american eagle, so nice...
but i dont want to spend too much money on clothings.... heehee
maybe wait till on sale, then... haha!
coz you know... american eagle is just a very very pop and nice brand,
i like it not coz it's the trend, but, their style is really nice man.
castle, but ... stylish, i love the color match.
the design is quite suit. for teens, at least nice for 20-25.
i know i'm only 19... but here, every 19 looks like 20+++
so... i'm fine =)

http://www.ae.com/

nice.

so tired...

darling didnt turn on the phone today.
two days cant talk to him, i really miss him so much haha
but i'll wait... =)
love him love him love him.

>>July 31, 2005 at 6:30:32 AM GMT+8

2005 年 7 月 30 日 星期六 【晴】

very busy,

busy with the power point, resume, project and final exams,
and i know later we will have the fial paper.

sigh...

i didnt call darling yesterday,
coz i siad that i dont want to bother him...
but i think i would call him tonight =) heehee
i really miss him alot..... everytime when i 'm alone... i'll always think of him.
he's already living in my heart.
i'm not sure whgat will happen in the future,... but right now...
i cant see if i could just leave our relationship.
and i dont want to do that also.
i think we will have a bright future.
but all...... is just like what i said...
it's so hard, but i can just pray, right?

ok...
mom told me last night,
she called me,
toronto got bomb attacked.
i'm so affraid... i ve friends in toronto, too.
and... i'm just a bit scared...
mom asked me to stay at home tonight, dont go to watch the firework.
of course i know it'd be very very dangerous if there'd be anything happened...
but i really want to watch firework,..... =(
pil ask me to go...
sigh..... i really want. but it sounds like i shouldnt go.
anyway, i'll go downtown first, then decide to go or back.

i feel terrible for the bomb attack.
plx.... pray... for all....

miss darling soooo much....

>>July 30, 2005 at 9:10:55 PM GMT+8