2008 年 8 月 30 日 星期六 【晴】

hey there..

today... is just busy.
humm last night, we went over to Hailey's aunt home.. hummm near ard the Oakridge Center..
i dont like what she did.. but she seems like a nice person... but.. too much for me. i kindda feel
suffocated while dealing with those Chinese ppl who are "too nice", that makes me feel a bit
uncomfortable. last night was at her place with Hailey.. hummmm her house is nice... but... i dont know.

anyway.. help moving into UBC. super super tiring. tough.
then... she drove me to my aunt's home. yea.. now i'm at my aunt's place. i couldnt use wireless
on my own lap top.. have to wait for her son to tell me the password.. so.. yea.. using her lap top..
it's still better than nothing or standing an hour at the library or in UBC for using the internet.

i went to Joy's home for dinner tonight. saw Phil as well, and yea Shi Ge too. haha.. they told me
Rio left today. he was back to Van and he left again! ha.. so anyway... nice dinner time with them.
i like them. then.. back to aunt's home...

hummm... i ve kindda figured what i should do.. and then that man is back to China. then he met my
dad at the airport.. humm mom called me today... kindda asking me the situation here and what happened.
finally i got the chance to tell them what really happened. coz when i was still with them, i didnt feel
okay to tell the truth. it wasnt polite, and there wasnt any chances. so yea.. today afternoon, i just
told mom what happaned.. and how angry i was. and how uncomfortable i felt with them.
humm mom kindda understands.. so.. yea... then i am still waiting for Stephen's sms.. but i dont know..
he still hasnt replied.

>>August 31, 2008 at 6:37:21 AM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 29 日 星期五 【晴】

=( hummmmm.

we just checked out this morning, and i'm moving in to aunt's home tomorrow. finally got a place to stay.
i'm happy to get rid of them, but then the thing is they didnt pay me. the man said.. he would contact
daddy, and then dad would give me money after back to HK. so... no canadian money? omg.
yea.. i still have some currency, not much. then i have some money in my bank account..

i was with them yesterday and the day before.

the day before, after canceling the appointment with Stephen.. they didnt want me to go out witjh them,
then i walked ard and met Cyn for lunch. then went to Richmond to bring mooncakes to my aunt..
then rushed back to the hotel to join them for dinner. i freaking hate the fake stuffs. and so obviously,
i got betrayed as well. that night i felt so terrible coz.. of that... happened.

then the next day, yesterday, we went back to UBC for the orientation. then.. the lady and her friend
just went to some place to pay money. i was wondering what's going on. and there we go... they
bought some palce. it's hard for me to accept, but i still gotta pretend like normal. what the hell. i really
hate this. this just doesnt make sense at all. how could they do that? well.. Chinese? cool. thanks.
i'm Chiense too, but i would not do this, at least not to lie to my staff or the person who work for me.
sigh. it's hard for me to accept, how am i gonna tell Stephen? and the thing is i'm kindda responsible
for this, i trusted that man, probably i shouldnt let this happen. but.. how knows..
anyway.. i'm figuring something i can do now. coz it's quite unfair to Stephen. and i guess he might be
still mad.. probably mad at me as well.. sigh.

isometimes i would think.. i really like Vancouver. i really like staying here.
but.. if the ppl i'm with are driving me crazy, why not just stick with my family in HK. at least, i know
what i can do, what i will do, what i can have.. and sometimes .. life is fun there, ppl there make me
happy. here Vancouver.. i had pretty much fun and tears here. i love and enjoy myself here.
but when the ppl are making me sad and upset. i just wish i could go back to HK.
it's like.. nothing is perfecty, life is liek the rollercoaster.

gotta go. hope to get to the internet soon again =(

>>August 29, 2008 at 6:33:14 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 27 日 星期三 【晴】

hihi.

being in Canada again is great. but then when things happen not in the way it's supposed to be, then
it's not good. well. having some problems here.. and it's just some unhappy thing.

the thing is.. i wish i could get rid of this a.s.a.p. it's just full of politics and full of shit. it's about the
position, about the culture, about the money, and about the relationship. it's all messed up, and i feel
so sorry for Stephen.. but i couldnt do much. and i feel so bad, coz i couldnt do anything before to
protect him and .. well.. it's kindda screwed. i'm at the middle.. like.. i'm just on his side, but not only
coz of the relationship with him but being realistic and doing what i should do... but then the client is
just... not the type of person would understand the way doing business here. say.. maybe he is better
with other ppl here, just not with Stephen then. ahhhhh i feel like shit. coz.. my responsiblity is to make
sure everything's fine, and now of course it's not fine.. he would never agree with the me or he just
doesnt understand teh situation.. then.. i feel like it's so unfair to Stephen and.. it might be something
more happening in the future once we get back to HK. this man is gonna be so mad again and probably
my dad would be involved.. coz somehow he's partly incharged. so.. you know.. Chinese ppl icould be
difficult, mainland Chinese is much much much worse. of course i couldnt complain to that man.. of
course i have explaint to Hailey and her mom, and they feel so sorry for me and Stephen. they told me
like.. they dont want us to argue on anything coz of them.. well.. the thing is.. whatever happened it's
all done and couldnt turn back time. and then.. what they're gonna do. and i really understand like..
if i were Stephen, i would have been so mad and stuffs. coz it is. the fact is that.

at least now... i can just forget about it, like.. it's much better than keep it dragging then i still need to
follow up and take care of them. they're just way too much, and bringing way too much troubles.
and it's better for Stephen too somehow.. he wouldnt need to deal with them anymore.

now it's like.. when i'm being with them.. i feel like i'm being with the unreasonable king. he doesnt act
rude to me, but he just doesnt fit the culture here when things come serious. and he's the boss anyway.
i cant just run away or quit. i still havent got any money from him, and i wonder if i could stay alive
without them since i'm runing out of cash soon. sigh. why why and why. why ppl have to make things
so complicated.

besides, i've met Stephen yesterday. it was all great, really great untill he driving me to the bus station..
i as kindda speechless when he told me some news. then.. Cyn and i met up too. finally she didnt
go seeing her friend but she wanted to see me. we met downtown.. had some tea.. chated for awhile,
then i went back to the hotel.

i am at the library now. no internet i can use in room. too expensive.. so.. hope to get back to the
internet soon. couldnt really call back to HK much even though i do have my idd card and phone number
here.. the thing is.. when it's afte 4 or 6 pm, it's all unlimited. it's $1 dollar plan. like.. paying $1 @day..
then even if i run out of credit by that day, i still can call after 4 or 6 pm but no sms.
then the thing is.. when i can call to HK to discuss with Shan about work or call my family... or friends
to talk about how awful things here are on going.. i just couldnt. coz after 4 or 6, i am with them.
so.. it's just.... terrible.

so.. it's like.. i feel so terrible.. feel so bad and sorry for Stephen.. i'm worried for my dad.. i'm worried
about that China man.. and i'm all stuck in the middle. hate being like this. and then the fact is.. it's not
my fault and not Stephen's fault, but you just cant blame that person, coz of the weird and difficult
position issue. then when i get back to HK, my dad 's gonna ask me tonz of ques. omg. it's so screwed.

and.. i still need to figure out where i'm moving to on the 30th =(

>>August 27, 2008 at 6:30:52 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 24 日 星期日 【晴】

Hi.

leaving home in an hour.
have been stressed... talking with honey, arranging things on my schedule and thinking of the office.
i couldnt really sleep. i still havent finished my packing. and i slept like less than 2 hrs, kept waking
though. anyway.. i hope everything's fine. thanks honey for help.

school has released the new website.. ha.. uiu.edu.hk and then i found my passage on line there.
i was soooo shock. they asked me to write something before to share with others about the school
life and the experience at school. i was like.. hummm okay. yea.. why not.. then.. i saw my name and
my face and my passage on line. and they spelled my name wrong. not Caster but Castor.

i'm still worry about my stay and the money. omg. hope everything's gonna be fine soon.
hope to see honey soon.. at least i would have someone to be there with me right. and i think honey
can handle that.

last night had the dinner with her family... i was a bit nervous but still okay. so now i understand more
and then not as stressed.. i just hope things would go well and i hope that i could help. anyway..
i wish to see my friends as well, and probably introduce them to her. and then yea.. surprised me that
dad had told the girl's dad stephen is my boyfriend. hummm.. anyway.. gotta go.. Cas.. i know you're
not prepared well enough, but... i know you will be fine. dont panic.

see you in Van.

>>August 24, 2008 at 11:00:23 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 22 日 星期五 【晴】

last day of work before i leave again.

working on stuffs. driving me crazy. some parent scolded me not confirming make-up class this
morning like 9 am. of course i was not picking up. it's not business hr. i was still home taking care
of my own business. rushing to leave home. she kept her words on like for a few mins non-stop.
i wondered how i was gonna explain and tell her the truth. jesse.. she was rude.
the renovation next shop is crazy too. i was so mad. coz it's the most dusty day i've ever seen.
i really hate this, and i finally complaint. however it didnt really work.

anyway.. i do have my concerns.. like... i've to hand over work to Shan.. sigh.. i didnt finish all,
then i'm leaving on Mon. i'm kindda worried.. we need things to be done, otherwise... i dont know how
i'm gonna tell the parents about no classes in the first week or weeks in Sep coz we couldnt fix the problems.

i'm a bit worried about my stay and the money about this trip too. i have no ideas where i am gonna
stay after checking out the hotel on the 29th. glad that Hailey and her dad are both happy about the
apartments which honey found them. i hope everything would be fine.

sometimes i wonder i'm just a young girl.. working part time and studying for my first degree..
but somehow i know that i'm not so young anymore. i cant always say i'm young and let myself
being lazy or help myself finding excuses when i didnt finish my work well. . ..

>>August 23, 2008 at 3:45:50 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 21 日 星期四 【晴】

YAY... i was so happy last night when i heard that today would have typhoon signal #9.
ha.. so i slept late.. and.. yeshhhh~ enjoying my long sleep. i woke up like... 12 noon..

then.. i'm just really really exhausted.. like.. sleeping right after lunch..
i checked the dvd. omg.. it's pissing me off.. i've tried once already, i took it back and they changed
another one for me. still not working. i need this by Sunday. i'm giving it to Lisa.
then laying on the bed.. then... got up again.. and did some e-mail work..
hummm yea..

i got the really strong feelings recently. dont know if it's my girl instinct or what.. it's so non-scienticfic.
and then.. i found that some ppl are really terrible as in... liars.. what an ass..
i was clearing my e-mail inbox today. and i saw the conversation between Benny and i.
i got no feelings at all.. i read them again. i couldnt feel the anger i once had with him. yea.. of course..
coz it's over already. there's nothing at all. but then.. while reading again, i was very calm this time,
and then i see more clear on how much he has been lying to me, and still wanted to hide up something.
i didnt tell him everything i ve found out. if i did, i think he wouldnt have to be so sure about pretending
as some nice nice guy anymore. he could have just taken the musk down. what for anyway?
while the person tried so hard to protect his mask, covering his real face, that means he has been
really living in fear and being desperate. he wouldnt wanna face himself anyway. it's just not necessary
for me to care about anything regarding him. he is still full of shit afterall.

so.. actually in this world.. we do have some ass and big liars could lie pretty well.
then i asked myself why i deserved such person. i think being nice is just... me. and there's nothing
i wanna change about that. my friends, my family are all nice to me. most of the ppl i've known are
all sweet and nice to me. i'm so happy and lucky to be me. i just dont get it.. why the ppl have to do
such things to hurt the other ppl. i bet them dont do this on purpose, wll maybe some ppl intend to do
so, but whats the reason behind?

if there's no reasons, how about motivation? intend to get some goodies? if so, why not just write it
on the face so that everyone would know what you want. so ppl can decide whether giving you or
not. then s/he doesnt have to do so much or act or lie to get what they want.

if they do love the person... why not just ... do the best they could to love the person..
instead of playing games or cheating or lying... there are much more they can do, right?
okay.. maybe they are not satisfied with the mate.. then... break up.. and.. go look for the right one.
or maybe... some ppl are just in the difficult situation, they need some fresh air, so let's have a fling.
but i think... while the next morning come, when you're all alone, it would still be the same. same lonely
day begings, same silent night. and then the guilty voices come. and you wonder what you really want
isnt just a fling. some ppl chose to be abusive to one another coz they are insecure. they need more
power so they would feel good about themselves. would they really feel good about themselves?

no. i dont know. it's imbalance. who would be happy about the imbalance. just like... when a person
who is insecure, s/he wants the control so bad, s/he suffers in it. then while they have it, they would
have one moment feeling great. but after that, when they started to think about the others and things,
then... s/he would step back a bit. and it would be back on again, like the cycle. lack of confidence,
dont know what the long lasting happiness is, unsure about everything, how s/he would feel happy
about themselves? it's like.. while this person doesnt know how to love and appreciate himselfe or
herself, how the person could expect they know how to love another one or live happily. i think this
is a bit more like the serious problem that usually not happening.. but the fact is that... many ppl are
living in the unfuntional family or having the failing or disatisfied realtionship.
of course it is very extreme. like... more than obsession or more in severe insecurity. what about the
victim? same. insecure and angry. yes, victim does feel angry, just different way to release.

after studying so much about human behaviors and psychology..
i couldnt deny that i've been more open to different things in the world.. sometimes i get upset more
easily, especailly while i do try to put myself to another' shoes. empathy... i learn to apprecaite and
love myself more.. the self, self respect.. but then.. it's difficult.. coz i have emotions too. and when
things happen on myself and the ppl close to me, then it's really difficult for myself to stay un-bais.
unless i pull myself back as the bystander... it's just not right anyway... so... i shouldnt repress my own
feelings, shouldnt deny on that. but then at the same time, i gotta apply what i've learnt to my life.

so why i deserved such ass in my life? my friends have told me to listen to them. i did listen, but i just
chose to belive in the person that i liked at that time. friends might think i'm so stupid. no.. i dont think so.
yea i felt stupid but i dont think i's stupid. i think he was the one being stupid. well.. what's the right and
wrong afterall? there's no need to find out anymore. everyone is insecure somehow, that drives us to
live better, create better life. so we all have progress and grow up. i think.. while you've done enough
bad things, maybe you should really stop. while you still have time to do something great to yourself
and the others, just take action to find something meaningful in your life in stead of being sad and lost or bored.
while you still have some ppl care about you so much, still beside you being with you, for you, you
should really learn to appreaciate them in real, coz at the end... it's just the love for yourself as well, anyway.

i still dont get it why ppl lie so much.. like my other firends.. everyone got some stories, being cheated
somehow.. in my life, i've met 2 guys like that already. after these, i have nothing to say to them
anymore. it's like... alright.. i've found out already. that's okay and enough. i could understand and
really i can understand and forgive.. coz.. i think.. beside hurt.. i feel so sorry for them as well.
like Benny.. i could have much more to tell him to prove him. just not necessary.
then while these happened to my friends, i was so angry at those guys. like what the hell, who you
think you are that can hurt my frineds like that. okay.. so... ? back to the original problem.. why do you
have to do this.

everyone got different situation. i think i do respect that. and it's not about right or wrong anymore..
well.. i dont have the right to judge on anyone. or say... i'm not him or her, we all have different life.
but i do hope that... whoever had ever lied to me.. just stop doing this to me.. sometimes it's not that
i dont know, it's just i dont speak. i dont speak coz i respect the person and i hope someday there's
just no necessary to lie to me anymore. i would never agree i deserve such things. if it comes,
i would take it, but why you have to let it happen if you do care about me as much as you do to
yourself. if you dont care about me, then why you calim you do.

i hope my frined would get over soon. she's a strong girl, and i think she will be fine.
and.. for the ppl who cheat or lie... hope them being brave to tell the truth. i have said i hated Benny
to tell me the truth after 4 years on the day before my bday. yes i did hate it happened.. but... it's also
good to know the truth i deserve after all these 4 years. i used to wonder why why and why.. till the
day i've really let go.. i just stop to wonder. and somehow it comes back to surprise me. it is like..
re-hitting me again. but then.. life is like that isnt it. when i dont expect it anymore, it just comes back.

thanks God.. i have grown up lots..
bible said patient gives ppl wisdom, that's right.

>>August 22, 2008 at 1:04:23 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 20 日 星期三 【晴】

humm..

worked. tired. worked.
same same. it was nice to chat with Carole and Medy though..
lunch with Miki and Leggy. it was not bad. then worked on the schedule again. it's all fixed now.. yay..
thanks god. i just let it be actually. i'm just too tired to tense up. well.. i cant always fulfill everyone's
wishes. no perfection anyway.

then.. after work.. Mendy asked me for help. i went to her office.. then putting the wedding dress on..
putting those accessories on my head... discussing with her about what i feel about this and that..
haha.. my first time to wear the wedding dress =) i was joking with her that YAY i'm getting married.
haha.. we both laugh out loud.. so funny.. i said yea right, getting marry tomorrow. haha.. then she
asked who the groom is.. i said i dont know, she would see tomorrow. haha. then yea. she said i look
good in this wdding dress. NOOOOOO. ha...

then back home resting..
playing piano with Miki. she teaches me. ha. nice. we can play some songs together =)


惡作劇之吻


＊我找不到很好的原因　去阻擋這一切的情意
i cant find the good reasons to stop my feelings for you
　這感覺太奇異　我抱歉不能說明
the feelings is too special that i'm sorry i couldnt explain.
　我相信這愛情的定義　奇蹟會發生也不一定
i believe in the definition of love, maybe marical would happen.
　風溫柔的清晰　也許飄來好消息
the wind was so gentely blowing, maybe it would bring the good news.
＃一切新鮮　有點冒險　請告訴我怎麼走到終點
everything is fresh, a bit risky, please tell me how to get to the end.
　（我才發現　你很耀眼　請讓我再瞧瞧你的雙眼）
(i just find out, you're shiny and charming, please let me see your eyes again.)
　沒有人瞭解　沒有人像我和陌生人的愛戀
no one would understand, no one would be like me to fall in love with some stranger.
△我想我會開始想念你　可是我剛剛才遇見了你
i think i will start to miss you now, but i just met you.
　我懷疑這奇遇只是個惡作劇　ah~
i wonder this is just the prank. ah~
　我想我已慢慢喜歡你　因為我擁有愛情的勇氣
i think i have started falling, slowly, coz i have the courage of love
　我任性　投入你給的惡作劇　你給的惡作劇
i let myself fall into your prank, the prank you made.
Repeat ＊,(＃),△



遇到


你身上專屬的陌生味道　是我確認你存在的目標
you have the special smell on your body, and that s your remark.
不用來回張望了　直到今世我們相隔著一個街角
you dont have to look back, this life we are just one street apart.
這麼久了我還是可以看到　感覺得到你對我的重要
after so long, i still can see and feel how important you are to me.
不會被天黑天亮打擾　你每一次的溫柔我都想炫耀
it wouldnt be disturbed by the dawn, i wanna be proud of your every gentleness.
我們繞了這麼一圈才遇到　我比誰都更明白你的重要
we have wasted our time, no one understand better than me how important you're to me.
這麼久了我就決定了　決定了　你的手我握了不會放掉
i have already decided that i wouldnt let go of your hands since... that soon.
＊我們繞了這麼一圈才遇到　我答應自己不再庸人自擾
we have been walking on circle. i ve promised myself not to fool myself again.
　因為我要的我自己知道　只要你的肩膀願讓我靠
coz i know what i want, and i only want you with your shoulders for me to lean on.
(Repeat All Once)
這麼久了我就決定了　決定了　你的手我握了不會放掉
we have wasted our time, no one understand better than me how important you're to me.
Repeat　＊

>>August 21, 2008 at 5:35:49 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 19 日 星期二 【晴】

=(

yesterday.. i got an appointment in the morning for some check up. i need to wait for a week to see the
reports. then after that, i went to TST to pick up something for Joy. then i went back to Sha Tin to
meet up Leggy and mom for lunch at IKEA. then i was looking for some stuffs there as well.
then we went to the resturant to prepare for grandpa's bday party. hummm welcoming guests, then
haha.. some karaoke time.. then.. yea.. chinese style dinner.. it was good. we all had fun. seeing lots
of cousins.. chatted and played with them. like Isabella and Sheila.. we used to play together when
we were kids. then i saw Ciar as well.. and some cousins like Joyce.. very nice. i was very tired though..


back home checking mails and took care of some work.. called Shan.. then worked a bit and got
Hailey's reply.. and wrote Stephen an e-mail..
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


then today got up a bit late.. then talked with Stephen for a short while.. i was rushing to go actually..
then.. i thought i was late.. but then Shan was late too. then we bought breakfast and ate at the office.
then long meeting and fixing things.. then made phone calls and arrangement for the Sep. i was so
stressed. coz.. many students were abs on different days, then gotta make up for them, and then..
if i put diff level all into 1 class, the teacher would complain about that, and it's actually impossible for
them to all come at the same time, coz they're all busy. so.. sigh. and this is not the worst..

more difficult thing is that.. i couldnt figure out who is coming to teach the new classes i'm opening.
i'm so worried about that. and so there are many students are not confirmed with us. coz i cant even
ensure if the class would be opened on time and with whom. we could lose lots of students.

everyonbe demand for something, and how can i possibly fulfill all wanted? Ella wants all make up
classes, wants new students, wants new classes, wants everything ready for Sep. Shan wants
and needs everything done before i go. Carole wants stable number of students, wants the most
updated info anytime, wants the books not missing, wants something that i cant control. Sophia wants
everything ready before she shows up. then Ella wants some more personal requests. so... these ppl
are all my concern at work, and at the same time.. what about the parents and the students?
i try my really best to offer what i can or we can.. try my best to give them what they want and need.
it's just driving me nuts.

sometimes.. i feel so bad.. coz.. it's like... i totally understand why Carole is not happy about the stuffs.
coz i would be so unhappy too. but here is HK, not Canada. and i've tried my best to update everything.
but somehow.. it's not up to me if the student just doesnt show up or if they could skip one class or
make up. coz.. if i could, i would just make them all come on time and leave on time, pay on time and
come at the time and the courses i design for them. but hell no. i've set up the rules, i just made copies
for them to put on the handbook. this is supposed to be done like when the business first started.
i do want them in the right class, like.. their level is right for each others, the time is perfect, everything
perfect. but they cant, and it cant be perfect. so why expect that i can make such things perfect?
if ppl can find someone doing perfect job, ask that person to come supervising me. remember to pay
that person well too.

what about the insurance and liscen thing? and the tellephone, the internet contract? what the hell
did Ella do in the past 2.5 years? what about the tax and the money record? why it was all messy..
when i first started less than 2 years ago, it was all simple and plain. and within these 2 years..
we have expaned so much in the market. and why couldnt she just do her job instead of... being
hurried by the Gov for every deadline? i'm so frustrated. if she has done her part, then i dont need to
help her to do so much extra work like i'm the freaking employer, i dont need to handel such things
like when the Gov person called and asked, i gotta lie or something like that then being asked by Ella
right after.

that L Tree lady walked by today. i heard her voice everytime. then i glanced at her.. then i saw her
reading my new banner. omg. yes.. the new banner is on now. and.. it's nice. but.. i dont like her
reading my banner.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i just wanna cry. coz when the parents complaint, they were not nice. and i gotta listen to the teacher's
complaint, and the parents complaint, and help them to fix everything. then who is helping me or Shan?
sometimes.. thing just happens.. and it's totally not my fault. so? sometimes.. i feel better after explaining
myself to Carole, coz at least she understands my situation and who i am. and then.. she's just nice..
like Sophia.. they both would concern on me when they see me very stressed.. well of course Shan
helps me lots too. thanks her so much.. so i do wish her finding her dream job.. you know.. i do need
someone here helping me... but if she can have the better job, i do hope she will go for that and sucess.

for Hailey.. the trip.. i'm a bit worried. coz i still have no ideas where i am going to stay after she moving
into UBC. and then it's like.. there's no plan. i think i gotta make some backup plan. i hope to make an
appointment with honey. i dont want him like being on call for us. it's impossible, and so unfair to him.
hope things would be fine. i'm following up now.

got some bad news from Cyn. i feel so terrible for her. it's ... just.. terrible. i hope i could do something
for her. i dont know... hope to give her a call tomorrow again..

Castor... what are you gonna do... what are you gonna do...

i guess i need to do a bit research.. and then.. yea.. some work later on..
oh yea.. Dr.Chan replied my e-mail.. he is willing to supervise on my final research in Oct. great..
i just need this to grad.

i wanna cry.

Cas... hang in there. you know.. just.. do whatever you think you should do. do your best, no regrets.
and.. i miss him. i'm glad that he has recieved my post. i hope he likes them.

>>August 20, 2008 at 2:33:57 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 17 日 星期日 【晴】

i tried to go to bed early.. after watching tv, i just went to bed..
but i couldnt sleep sighhhhhhh... i was tossing and turning till 3 sth am..
then i woke up ard 8 30am this morning.. rushing to go, skipped breakfast.

i went back to the office, then started work. it was very busy today.
busying opening, then i fixed sth at the store room.. then updated the schedule for the teachers and
us, then wrote a letter for the Sep classes. i still need to write 3 memo for Mon, Tue and Wed classes.
then Mendy and Carole came.. got some chat with them, listening to Mendy's problem.. then helping
Carole.. then rushed for lunch with mom and Leggy. then bought some colour paper, and back to the
office. fixing the schedule, some parents called in.. then i called the sales person for some paper
order.. then i startd working on the new banner, have been standing since 2 sth till 8 pm. did lots of
painting.. cutting and pasting.. then i also made a baby birthday card for Ella's baby. it's nice. i'm glad
that i could get them done today. the thing is... i made the banner design on Fri and Sat pm, and..
i saw that L Tree woman walking by our center. and then.. today when i walked by their door,
i saw her posting some piece of paper writting "Back to School." i was kindda like... speechless!
SO FAST. she's sooooo fast. and i hate this. then the next shop is opening soon. that owner lady
was always standing at the door and staring at our center sometimes. i saw her staring, then she
looked away. she is not even friendly. and so i'm worried. so.. i just gotta make sure everything that
i do would be 100% perfect. coz i'm not gonna lose anything to those women.

of course these stuffs are not very important.. the more important thing is.. our courses and teachers.
and then i hope the parents can feel how sincere we are to their kids. i do concern on their needs and
if our service can help the kids. this is why i'm doing my job extra well. i do that not only for Ella, but
for the kids, and for everyone' sake.

Ella's mom was here. she asked me lots of ques.. then Ella called me and asking me ques. it makes me
wonder if Ella wanted to check on me or what. otherwise why her mom talked on phone with her, then
she called me afterward. then Ella called her mom and then called me again. so weird. why not just
talked to me once, but cut them into pieces, called me in every few mins? i wasnt free.

then before her mom left, her mom asked me if all the decoration was made by me.. hummm not all, but
90%.. Ella did the board when i wasnt there. but i did the painting. then... other stuffs yea.. i made
them. the banner we are using now is not made by me. it was the printer and Ella put some little flowers
on then put it up. but the coming new banner is done by me today. hummm she said i'm very creative.
i was thinking like.. oh yea.. of course. i always got A in art, i was the top one in junior high. but.. i gave
it up when i went to F.4 i chose A-Math group. anyway.. i was thinking yea i am very creative and i
could do very good art work, give me a raise will you?! =P hahahaha.. just kidding.
but it does make me happy. i mean doing art stuffs. i do enjoy it alot. i could stay focus for a really long
time easily.

i left Shan long memo.. coz i wanted to go back to the office tmr, but i couldnt..
i would have an appointment tmr morning.. the check up... then i will meet Leggy and mom for lunch,
then we would go to Sha Tin preparing the Bday party dinner for grandpa. busy busy day.

i want Shan to help me putting that banner on no matter what. coz i couldnt stay any one more day
behind. it's like we gotta be fast and get well prepared for Sep. then many other works to do. i wanna
get them done before i go.

i talked with Stephen today... hummmmm =)
hope to see him soon.

>>August 18, 2008 at 5:28:30 PM GMT+8

2008 年 8 月 16 日 星期六 【晴】

i just rest rest and rest.

recently, i fall in love with Chibi Maruko-Chan 小丸子 haha. so... everynight i just watch it before sleep.
i watch it with my sis-es everynight ard 1 am.. then.. just laugh a lot. i like this cartoon.. i think it's
just very.. cute. and i used to be called 小丸子 since i was 11.. and till now..the old friends from
highschool still call me 小丸子.. not castor. so.. it just makes me laugh more.. it's nice..
at least i can relax and laugh at the end of the day.

i woke up pretty late today.. then made sandwiches for lunch.. lovely. fresh tomato with ham.. with
the olive walnut bread. i cut them in small pieces.. haha.. so cute.
then.. in the afternoon i just fell asleep while watching movie.. when i woke up.. mommy and daddy
re back. aunt Ching was here too. so we had dinner together. we watched Guo JingJing and Lin Dan,
the Olympic. it was really great. i like Guo JingJing. and then Lin Dan was quite funny. after winning,
he threw his bat to the ppl, then he untied his shoes and threw them to the ppl as well. i did my cycling
for 1.5 hr again. the 3rd time in this week.. but.. i dont find myself losing weight. omg. i really hope to
slim down a bit. i should keep exercising more i guess.

tomorrow i would go back to work. and i hope i could make an appointment to do some check up this
week.. i have been postponding it actually. humm..

tomorrow Karen would be leaving. i left her a mesg on facebook. humm i didnt call her tonight. i guess
she might be a bit busy packing stuffs. then Cap would be leaving soon too. then would be me next
week on 25th. hummm.. i think i'm not expecting anything now.. just wanna do my job and then visit
some friends. if suprises come, then i would be happy, otherwise it would still be nice to be back to
Van =) the thing is i'm not staying long this time, and probably i wont have much personal time or free
time. if ppl wanna see me, then i might stay a few days longer, but i'm not so sure. i wanna meet
Stephen more often, but ... see if he could make more time for us anyway.

alright, Cas.. go back to sleep.. dont worry for stuffs that you wouldnt know, especially for those
you cant do much about. coz.....while you've tried hard, then it's just not up to you anymore i guess?

>>August 17, 2008 at 5:26:31 PM GMT+8