9 : 40 arrived school ~ Prof. for MRK264 was a bit late. I picked him to be my prof. as I had a great expreience w/ him last semester in Business. He delievered lectures in a interesting fashion, and he had all stuff avialabe online ~ also, he is quite concerned abt students ^^ He recgonized me even I was wearing a cap n wearing glasses ~ haha ! but he called me out to demonstrate sth in front of class >.<"
11 : 40 borning accounting class again ~ I really have a problem understanding Black's English. I did pay close attention but I just couldn't get what he was saying. I really wanna kill myself......how stupid and useless I am !!! I gotta work extra hard to get an A in this course !
Trade my used English book for $ 30 ~ just equal to the amount I paid for Eng book this semester ^^
1: 30 ~ had marketing in the same classroom as accounting. My energy level dropped near to zero, so tired. This was a noisy class, perhaps, I still haven't fully adoped to the style of learning in Western countries........ppl were yelling out all da time......I had a hard time to stay focus.......I hate group activities....I dun wanna work w/ anyone, tho I know this is a must, and I cannot avoid it. I must learn how to work w/ others......so worry abt the grouping.......I just dun know how to ask ppl to allow me get into their group.
三點鐘放學,3 點20 分番到屋企。第一件事係一邊拆信一邊開電腦。等緊開 MSN 的時候打電話俾 Kenn;開到 MSN 同Kenn傾左一陣,話俾佢聽我收到 G1 車牌,之後媽咪入左黎,我 turn off 左 MSN 的聲 ~ 等媽咪走左之後,我聽到佢 d 呼吸聲好平穩, so i assume 佢訓著左 la ! 佢今日咁累,我亦都唔想嘈醒佢。therefore i kept the microphone off. 無幾耐,佢無喇喇鬧我做咩 turn off 左個 mic ( 我之前 promise 過佢唔會 turn it off ) ,發晒脾氣咁樣 ~ 每個人都有 privacy,加上我唔想我食野 / 講野/ 電話響 / 擺底個 headphone ge 聲嘈到佢 ~所以我先 turn it off.......
I dun wanna argue w/ Kenn ~ 我好累,番學好唔開心,但我未有機會同佢講佢已經發我脾氣。算喇........唔想 argue. went downstairs 去沖 coffee 冷靜下 ( will I die becox of too much caffeine? ) ~ I started to doubt.......
每段感情都唔會長得過 5 個月 ~
我的愛情運是否被下了詛咒,
無論我多麼努力還是逃不過命運 ?
around 8 pm, he launched webcam n appologize to me .....he also asked me what have happened today, as I seemed so unhappy. I told him, apart from the fact that he turnned me down, it was all abt the grouping issue and I felt so bad abt myself that I seemed not gainning and improving at all......I cried and cried. He comforted me.....I was calm for a few mins, then I cried again.....he realized how bad I felt cox my tears seemed to be endless.........
I have the same problem again ~ I'm always afraid n over-worried abt things that haven't been done. 未做就驚定先 ~ 認定自己做唔黎 ! This limited my real ability. Self-fulfilling provicy, which means you begin to believe what you say after you repeating the same message to yourself for a thousand times. This theory can also be used in a possitive way by saying nice and encouraging statments to yourselves. However, I am surely using this theory in a wrong way.......
Canon in D
>>January 18, 2007 at 3:08:23 PM GMT+8
2007 年 1 月 11 日 星期四 【晴】
5 months anniversary
11 : 00 Steven & Annie arrived picked me up from home to York. Thanks them for waking up extra early ^^ as there was a pipe broken on our way to York, it slowed down the traffic >.<" It took us 30 mins to there......I bought a used English book from a gal at the price $ 30 ~ abt 60 % of the original price.
Then we went to McDonal for lunch.....I had Fish burger ~ haha Annie & Steven said that I am HKers becox only HK ppl order fish burger .....reli ?! haha ~ anyways.....wanna thx Steven for the meal ~
Went to school, did the photocopy of notes for my mum...again !!
1 : 30 English class.....It was so borning, I really wanna sleep but things that the prof taught were quite useful !! I can benefit from her ^^ hopefully ~ Before class end, she asked us to introduce ourselves. When it was time to dismiss, she asked us the name of another students, if we got it right, we could go; otherwise, we gotta stay ! luckily, I got it correctly ~*
3: 15 Human sexuality ~ I dropped culture & media and switched to this class. This class required NO TEXT BOOK ! should I be happy abt this? cox I dun have to spend money of book ~ but on the other hand, I felt so insecure, cox I dun have any thing solid to study w/.....I had a big problem of jotting notes in class as I couldn't catch the words, even I can catch it, I dun know how to spell.....moreover, this prof's handwritting is very slooply....
Back home @ 5 : 15 ~ tired......recorded Cannon in D.
Any idea what is this ET doin'? haha ~ from normal to crazy.........
Woke up this morning, still in a pretty bad mood. I kept repeating words to cheer up myself and I hoped to find some motivation to work hard and move up the stream. However, I was still in the gloomy blind alley.
詞窮了,再找不到可以安慰自己的字句
Kenn called when I was on the way to school. He had party tonight, enjoyed it ~! Missed you so much babe...
Arrived @ school @ 2: 10, had my new timetable printed out in the administration office.
2: 25 Economic class ~ try to stay awake in this class. the prof. covered sth abt the surface of econ, so it's kinda borning.....
3: 20 had web & graphic class, this was a class that basically taught us how to use different software to creat ads. I left the classroom 1 hour before it should end, cox it was damn borning and I've got all da information that I needed. It was kinda rude to leave in the middle of the class, but I reli couldn't stand it.....I whould rather to sit in the computer common and wait for my mum to pick me up in stead of sitting in the classroom. I couldn't calm down my anxiety....felt so uncomfortable in the classroom. FU*K ! dun know y, dun know that I was thinking, was there sth wrong in my head?
Tho I have had a hard time in the very begining of this semester, I told myself that I could survive in last semester, why can't I survive in this semester? I've already been here in Canada for 4 months, I should be more adopted to the environment, able to catch more words when others speaking, and express myself in a proper way.
Dealing w/ sell and buy 2nd hand book again.....a man called yesterday said that he wanted my Eng book, I said we would trade at my campus, but he "thought" that I was his campus, when I called him today to confirm time and place, I figured out that he misunderstood me. I said that I could try to go to his campus n drop him the book but he said this was very " trouble "....bull shit ! I couldn't see how trouble for him ! cox I was the one who travelled.....crazy !! dun waste my time ~
近日為了 timetable,為了揀最好俾分最鬆的 professors,為了賣 2 手書和尋找合適的 2 手書弄得個人心情壞透了 !!! well...as a grown up, I should be able to handle little things like these....以上的事證明了我還是一個需要磨練的人,少少的事已經令我大感壓力,頓失方寸,日後怎樣出來 highly competitive 的社會做事 ?
>>January 12, 2007 at 3:05:38 PM GMT+8
2007 年 1 月 9 日 星期二 【晴】
Tiring day.
I have 7 classes, each 50 mins.
There's a hour of break after I had 5 lessons.....crazy......
Marketing @ 9 : 50 ~ this course was taught by the same teacher last semester. Tho she wasn't perfect, I dun hate her. She recgonized me ! haha ~
Accounting @ 11 : 40 ~ This course was conducted by a black. I dun mean to disscriminate or what, but he spoke really soft, like speaking to himself. He looked at me n said that I was talking but I DIDNT ! after lessons, Annie & Steven told me that this was a kind of joking.....sorry, I really dun understand the humour in Canadian...class dismissed early, went to lunch w/ Annie & Steven.
English class @ 1 : 30, feeling better cox at least I understood what the prof. was talking. She was an Asian, n she said that if students worked really hard but still couldn't pass the course, she won't give a terrible grade; instead, she would give UNSAT so that the grade won't pull down the GPA !
had 1 hour break, do nth, try to look for 2nd hand book on the Internet. Sent a few email seeking for books.
Culture & media @ 3 : 20 ~ I was......so so so lost !!! I dun know anything abt Canadian popular culture at all. I tried so hard to listen and concentrate but I felt so so so bad. I dun wanna get a low grade in this course, I was considering to switch to another General Education options, but all other courses seemed cannot fit into my timetable, no matter how hard I switched around other exist courses......
After school, Peter drove me to 19th Street to see those tremendous huge houses !!! wow ~ so pretty !!!
The view of Markham ~
Then went to his place to visit lovely Pepper & Tiffy. Today didn't took any photo of them, cox I was in a bad bad bad mood......I felt a bit better w/ them, but still......
Had dinner at home. I didn't eat anything since 8am ~ haha !
I switched my courses Culture and media to THE DEVELOPMENT OF HUMAN SEXUALITY. This, perhaps, is the easiest way to change the General education option w/o screwing up the whole timetable.
其實我玩左化妝咁耐,都係成日整唔好 d 眼睫毛嫁 ! 唔係次次都可以 1 take 過整到佢地 hill 起嫁 ~ 以下夾眼睫毛的方法係一個係 lane crawford 做的化妝姐姐教 ge ~ 雖然我學左,但都唔係次次做到得心應手嫁 ! ! >.<" my make up skills 仍需練習.......
夾的方法係
先先係最貼眼睫毛根部果度夾 ( 如果你係用斜斜地擺係 table ge 鏡,就將鏡放係 table ,當你望鏡的時候 only 眼向下望,個頭唔好郁,形成隻眼好似合埋左2/3咁;如果你用 ge 係 hang on the wall ge 鏡,你就「缶」高個頭,眼向前望,亦都係好似合埋左 2/3 隻眼咁 )
用手掂住眼眉,「戚」高眼簾,之後就夾落去 hold 幾秒 ~ 之後就 un 下 un 下咁 ~ 輕輕夾下放下 ~
之後 " tun " 出少少 ~ 用同樣的方法夾眼睫毛中間的部份,唔需要 hold 太耐 ~ otherwise 會見到好明顯夾左 2 個位 ge mark ~
( 如有需要,可以 remove 左個夾先,睇下根部夾得好唔好。因為如果根部夾得唔好,之後的功夫都係晒氣 ge )
若果眼睫毛好長 ge 人~ 可以再 tun 出少少再輕輕夾一夾,不過就唔需要好大力
*以上係未搽 mascara 之前做 ge ~ 如果搽左 mascara 先夾,一定要等 d masacara 完全 dry 晒先好夾,如果唔係好易整 lug d 眼睫毛 and 推到 d mascara 1 舊舊 !
Woke up @ 8: 45 by my babe Kenn ^^ Had breakfast till 9 : 20 ~ haha ! I dun know y I can spend 35 mins on a silly breakfast.....I ate 2 pieces of bread so that I can wait until after school ( 3 : 30 ) to have my " lunch ".
Kenn watched me make up thru the webcam ~ haha ! he also reminded me to wear more clothes. He was shoked that I only wear a tee + jacket.....
Dragon & Tiger !! haha ~
Arrived school @ 11 : 17 ~ met up a woman fron the mainland China. She purchased used book from me. I sold her 3 books by the price of $ 120 ~ the orginal price is $ 3XX ! I also told her things abt my school, such as medical insurance benefit.....
Went to web & graphic design class ~ Our teacher was an old lady, she spoke slowly. Thought she made me fall asleep, if I can stay awake, I can listen 80 % of what's she was saying......she introduced some software that we gotta used during this course, I only know a bit of Photoshop & Dreamwaver ~ I haven't even heard of the rest of them >.<" Hope I will do well in this class.
Had 30 mins break, called my babe, he was abt to sleep. I did sth crazy....as I should have class in Room 564 @ 1: 30 ( it was 1 : 15 ) I went into the classroom, a class was conducting....I said " sorry, I was late " then I realized that I was 2 early n in the wrong class~ so so so so embrrassed....!!!
Economic class started @ 1:30 ~ I was there on time, guys are more than gals.....n I was the only Chinese gal in this class.....Hope I can surive.....The prof spoke very lound, like a firing gun! I disliked the way he spoke. He made me very headache....I was thinking of switching to another prof.....><"
Got a paper cut while photocopying notes for my mum >.<" PAINFUL !
It was freaking windy today. When I went out from school, I was almost blew away ( haha ~ a bit exergerate ! ). I ran up to my mum's car, but I could hardly open the door!! When I finally opened the door, I had difficulties to get into the car, cox the door would slam on me if I didn't act quick !
My babe didn't sleep, cox he was waiting for me to come home n use MSN to chat w/ him. He knew this was my 1st day school n he wanna share the bites and pieces of what I experienced today. I love u babe !!! I know you've tried so hard to maintain our long-d relationship ~ I am expecting we'll be a pair of stable couple ~
The woman who purchased book from me called at night, she said she dropped a course n she asked for refund. I explained that the responsibility was not on me, but her instead. Then she began to be mad and spoke so loud. I tried to talk but she kept raising her voice to cover my voice, she then hang up rudely!! She pissed me off !!
school starts tomorrow....packed 3 books for sell tomorrow, have my blinder cleared and ready for new notes. Gotta get the book list, I am wondering why the school doesn't announce the book list ahead of time but at the same time, it encourages students to buy the book earlier to aviod long queue at the book store >.<"
最後一日假期,我係玩三國無雙 4 黎結束 ge ^^
做好左一張 promote maths tutoring service and sell 2nd hand cell phone 的單張 ~ 聽日拎去學校影印先 ^^ 仲要幫媽咪 ge 麵粉花私人教班 ge notes 影印 !
如果我 露出斑點滿身 可會被抱緊?
在安慰人的時候,你有沒有口口聲聲說明白和了解對方的感受?
我也常常試著用「同理心」的方法去安慰別人;
但很多時,若非真正親身經歷過,是沒法確切地感受得到當中的滋味。
上天給我的折磨,是要讓我感受到那種人有多麼痛苦嗎?
還是希望我在嘲笑別人的時候,先想一想別人會有什麼感受?
以上兩件事我現在徹底的體會到了,
上天可否還給我那些我曾經擁有的?
還給我,還給我!!
I can't live w/o it
I wanna have a happy 19th-birthday
I wanna enjoy my adolescent
I wanna wear wedding gown
>>January 8, 2007 at 8:58:12 AM GMT+8
2007 年 1 月 6 日 星期六 【晴】
I'm really appericiated that Kenn won't force me to cheer up ~ it's a relief that I dun have to wear a fake-face-mask in front of him.
played PS2 三國無雙 4 w/ bro. 同細佬一齊打機係一種增進大家感情的好方法 !! 親人真係需要珍惜嫁 ~ 唔知點解,總係覺得自己會好早死,所以都係唔好成日鬧細佬 la ~ 希望係佢心目中留低一個好的印象 !! 唔想佢覺得家姐好惡 ~ 好難相處 ! 不過都係要鬧佢先肯熄 PS 2 ~ 3 : 40 am 先肯 off ....激死人 !!
I bought 2 lipfusion in Land Crawford in HK. I found out that this brand is avialable in Canada too ^^ there are more color to choose from compare in HK. So sad that I have already bought 2......
When my HR mascara used up, I may be try this Lash Fusion ~*
it's so funny that nowadays, almost all products claim to contains collagen ~ Is collagen that magical?
>>January 8, 2007 at 5:29:01 AM GMT+8
2007 年 1 月 5 日 星期五 【晴】
Shopping day @ Vaughan mills ( again )
Had a qurral abt " sleeping overnight in guys' home " as well as " I love him more than he loves me " w/ Kenn, felt so bad....so so so bad. I didn't have mood to put make up on, this was the first time I went shopping w/o make up. As my mum was shouting at me and hurried me to leave, he wrapped up our qurral by 3 promise, 1st : must eat sth; 2nd : try your best to get a pair of shoes, 3rd : dun ever mentioned the same thing again, just pretent we hadn't say anything. Why am I the one who do sth wrong everytime? Why you can say " if you insist do continue doin' the same thing, we should broken up " ? I remembered, you said that I should never use " broken up " as a weapon to threat you, cox you would treat this so serious. Once I say it out, it can never be withdraw. But what you said to me? Let alone all those upsetting things, he said that he will love me more !
Left home at 12 : 30. Arrived at 1 : 00. Had lunch in food court, New York Frise.......so expensive >.< " CAD $ 7.13 for those crap and junk food .....sigh ! the Pipse was terrible !
I was looking for 1/2 pair(s) of walking shoes on purposly.......However, I couldn't find anything which matches !!! They are either not worth as they were priced, or not the type I wanted.
I got a jackey, w/ Chinese 刺繡 ( a tiger and a dragon ) haha ~ so traditional ! It was on sale ~ original price is $ 179.99 >> $ 49.99 !!
Front
Back
Oh my god ! I wear size L !!!
Went into a perfume store and asked the sales to let me try the smell of Raphl Lauren ~ haha, of cox I was not goin' to buy, but I really liked the smell......so everytime I have a chance to try it, I won't miss it ~ haha
Mum got a jacket and bro got 2 tee from Reebok ~
Returned home @ 4 : 30 ~ Went to Pizza hut for a pizza for dinner at the price of $ 9.99, 2 topings. Waited in the car for 10 mins ~ had some argue again......mum said I was so lazy, not considerate abt her and never help. okok....fine ! I walked our of the car and stand in the store to wait for the pizza. I really wanna cry.......I wanted to earn big money, I wanna be able to support my parents, I will not allow ppl look down at me!
佢一還,就還我 $ 100 ! 佢都癡線......咁樣我不如 sell 番去學校 ge buy back 算數 ?!
我還佢 $ 135 ~ 之後佢又呢樣又果樣,最後還我 $ 120 !
唉 ~ 我口才真的需要多加練習 ! 激死人喇 !
陪媽咪 and 細佬去 First Markham Place 剪頭髮 ~ 好很悶 le.......因為我淨係陪佢地。細佬剪先,剪完就帶佢去 food court 食野~ 叫左個白汁煙三文魚三色粉 + 火雞汁雞球意粉。個 cashier 收少左 CAD $0.2 ^^
番到屋企同 Kenn 玩 webcam ~ 不過佢開左個 cam 講左幾句之後突然又諗到 d 新野 ( 關於整頭果 d la ) 咁佢就走左去對住 Mary ( 假公仔頭 ) 整左好耐 ~ 我想叫佢去訓,但又怕打斷佢的思緒。最後佢整完已經係 HK time 7 am >.<" 好彩佢第 2 朝番 2 pm 姐 ~ 佢怪自己整得太耐搞到陪唔到我傾計 ~ 傻豬黎 ge ! 男人以事業為重嘛 ~ 況且只係一日半日係咁樣,我又點會嬲啵 !! 開心都黎唔切 la ~ 因為每次諗到 d 野就代表又有 d 突破 and 可以發展得更好 ~ 同我都有關係嫁 !! 做得好 d ~ 咁就多 d 客 ~ 又可以收得貴 d ~ 快 d save 夠 $$ 做首期 ~ 到時我就可以做女主人 ^^
Today's look
Messy eye lashes......
Tired face, in car
奸樣 ?!
化左妝但一樣對眼係可以無神 ge......
cant see my face? haha ~ good !
開始著手寫愛情小說
名稱 : 待定
原因 : 不知道,有靈感吧? 也順道迫自己多用中文,以免犯上錯別字或執筆忘字等問題
題材 : 暫不公開
完成日 : 遙遙無期 ^^ hahahaha
結論是 : 什麼也不知道 !
>>January 6, 2007 at 12:44:47 AM GMT+8
2007 年 1 月 3 日 星期三 【晴】
尋晚唔開心,無心情同男朋友講電話。我聽左佢講一陣野之後就話眼訓收左佢線~佢有問過我幾次咩野事,我不斷話無野。今朝起身同佢講番 sorry ~ 佢問我咩野事,我話我尋晚發自己脾氣。其實佢都知我有野不過我 ( 或者有唔少女仔都係 ) 鐘意人地問佢好多次,表現到好似好有耐性 and 關心先至會講出黎 ~ also 我覺得自己好煩,cox 次次都係講 the same thing......但 babe 都唔 mind,仲好努力咁 tum 我開心。不過佢都知道,佢只可以 tum 到我表現開心 law ~ 但我 deep inside ge 唔開心係短期內都解決唔到 ge....
Watched 男親女愛 舞台劇 ~ it reminded me of what I did last Xmas ~ 我估現在的我未必有機會亦未必可以放得低好多的 concern 再去做多次 musical ~ 所以,好多野真係要趁後生去做 ! 咁樣先唔會有咁多 regret !