2009 年 7 月 1 日 星期三 【晴】

city u 筆試

最近做了超多筆試

上星期五機場的

星期六浸會的

星期一中大的

今天城大

明天督察

下星期四港大.......

woaw..........


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pole dance 第四課

新動作

1) walk ----> jump 右腳, 左腳 point toe, 伸直橫放pole 上, 左右手扶 pole, 右腳 point toe 伸直上 pole, 收腹, swing

2) japanese style to get up, swing down on floor, 雙手 slide down from pole, lie on one side, point 直右腳向上90度, 右腳向前 point 直, 起身


舊動作

1) chair

2) fireman

3) left leg hook n swing

4) right leg outer hook n swing

5) straight leg swing

>>July 5, 2009 at 2:46:17 AM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 30 日 星期二 【晴】

去了遊船河

好好好舒服喔!!!!!!!!

鹽田灣

是我一直很想 wild camp 的海灘

今天這裡水清沙幼

愛死了~~~~~~

謝謝 d invite me to go

thanks a lot

safe trip back to Ireland

:)


我愛大自然 :)

>>July 5, 2009 at 2:49:06 AM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 29 日 星期一 【晴】

跟朋友談起在事業方面的 peer group pressure

我曾經有過

但現在沒有這 pressure 了

原因卻有點可悲

可悲是因為眼見事業上越來越成功

薪金越來越高

位高權重的朋友們

self ego 一天比一天的大

這叫我卻步

我並不希望成為他們一樣

在我的角度看

個人成長發展作切入點

這並不是進步

而是退步

有沒有錢越賺越多而 self ego 越來越小的人呢?

除了 meditation 見過這類型的人以外

身邊的朋友沒有一個是這樣的

唔........

我不想自己成為這樣的人

.........

>>June 29, 2009 at 1:08:56 PM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 28 日 星期日 【晴】

我發現某方面我是非常的 fragile

而且不懂 speak up for myself

只會覺得 '谷' 住度氣覺得對方不對

但又不懂即時反應

愛情方面如是

ex 的 accusation 完全沒道理

但我卻 totally paralyzed 不懂反應

被人非禮時是如是

不懂站出來

不會出聲

朋友觸及我最傷痛的地方時如父親過身時如是

覺得她很過份

但又不能即時回應


開不了口

最近嘗試觀察著當下的情緒

感覺到自己不忿心跳加速的感覺

感覺到自己覺得對方非常過份的感覺

delay action

是好事嗎?

it depends.......


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Quoted from Mirabelle Summer's

"Basic attitudes or beliefs that make up a self-confident attitude? After some thought, here's what
I came up with:

# 1: Lose the fear of trying, getting hurt or failing

Have you ever felt that twinge of uneasiness before going to a
party or going out on a date? Relax, that only means you're human!
NO ONE is safe from those stomach-churning, palm-sweating, terror
stricken moments. It's only NORMAL to feel those emotions.

Yet, you shouldn't use it as a reason to MISS OUT on the infinite
number of chances for personal growth. I know a lot of friends and
clients who get STUCK hemming and hawing with what they want to do
instead of actually doing it.

The longer you let fear and hesitation dictate your actions, the
harder it's going to be to break out of your self-induced funk.
When the occasional anxiety-ridden moment becomes a full-blown
habit, it will take its toll on your social life.

Pretty soon, your chances of finding the perfect guy for you will
slowly dwindle down to NIGH IMPOSSIBLE.

So, you have to realize that continuously saying "NO" to challenges
and being content to wallow in a self-absorbed universe has to be
stopped as soon as possible. "Protecting" yourself from failure is
going to catch up to you one of these days, trust me.

As early as now, go and find some worthwhile pursuit other than
your actual line of work. Having a BALANCED set of objectives
keeps you from disengaging yourself from life.

A passionate, driven woman is naturally focused on enriching her
life and opens up the chance to meet all sorts of folks, including
would-be suitors along the way. Of course, a little bit of
temperance should be thrown in for good measure.

As we just mentioned, a thriving life is all about balance so you
shouldn't mindlessly say "yes" to absolutely everything that comes
along. Like what Carl realized, you only have to accept the
opportunities that FEEL RIGHT to you.

I know that's a highly subjective area, so you'll have to go with
your gut on this one. As long as it will make a positive impact on
yourself and the people around you, GO FOR IT.

Not trying at all will leave you feeling bad anyway, so it's only
logical to take a calculated risk. Look at this way: playing it
safe will teach you NOTHING, so you might as well try even if you
might get hurt in the process.

Even you take a stab at a relationship and it doesn't work out, you
will have at least taken away something. That's a lot better than
just sitting around and permanently blocking off the road to
self-improvement.

#2: Being single (for now) is A-OK.

If anyone ever told me that the ultimate purpose of existing on
this planet is to find a man to settle down with, I'd have to tell
them to have their head checked. Seriously, what about your other
hopes and dreams?

Your life is by no means over after you get hitched, and neither is
it "empty" or "incomplete" just because Mr. Right hasn't come
knocking on your door.

Sure, we're biologically driven to go forth and multiply, I get
that part. But is our evolutionary programming the sole basis of
how fulfilled we are as individuals?

Hmm, let me think...um, NO.

Imagine if you were dating this guy and you felt like your genes
were going to be weeded out of existence if marriage wasn't in your
collective future. Wow, that's hot...NOT!

If your only purpose in life is to find that "prize catch", it'll
always seem like you're after something. To a guy, that
desperation feels like a big, fat target painted on the back of his
head.

Suddenly, it isn't that hard to imagine why he hasn't called back.

It's just like betting all your life savings on a game of roulette.
Anticipating the outcome will make anyone nervous, self-conscious
and generally weird.

The funny thing is that simply NOT CARING about what happens will
actually stack the odds in your favor! When you relax and focus
your attention on him, it's infinitely more appealing than being
distracted with the what-ifs.

See, this goes hand in hand with the first attitude we covered
earlier. A well-rounded life keeps you from being bored and
frustrated, which means that you aren't looking to a guy to fill
any "missing spaces".

Since you don't have to fall madly in love with the next guy you
meet, you're genuinely interested in what your date has to say to
you. That kind of attitude creates WILD amounts of attraction and
you'll reel him in without breaking a sweat.

So the next time you go out a guy, stop playing fortune teller by
predicting how many kids you'll have with him, or where the
honeymoon will be. Instead, RELAX into the moment and pay
attention during the conversation.

I can't stress enough how special a man feels when he has your
undivided attention. Nothing validates a guy better than directing
all your energies towards him - trust me, he'll feel like he won
the lottery.

What if the two of you don't seem as compatible as you first
thought you were? Maybe his priorities and values differ greatly
from yours. Perhaps your heart is telling you that he isn't "The
One".

Oh, the humanity!
But wait, aren't there a million other men living on the same
planet as you are? So there's really nothing to mope about.

Life isn't scheming make you miserable. In fact, it's got plenty
of other quality guys lined up for you to meet.

It boils down to a matter of CONFIDENCE. When you're secured
enough with a self-made life and aren't in a frenzied rush to meet
Mr. Right, things can only get better.

Today is the time to stop asking yourself if you're good enough.
Instead, be the best version of yourself - those kinks will work
themselves out soon enough."

>>June 29, 2009 at 9:32:49 AM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 27 日 星期六 【晴】

去 ht

window shopping

回家

游閒的一天


為何在公司被咬的蚊 '蘭' 痕了兩個星期還是痕

甚麼變態蚊來的........

>-<

好痕呀! 好痕呀!

>>June 28, 2009 at 3:06:33 PM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 26 日 星期五 【晴】

今天 hkbu written test

中午吃了期待已久

一知道今天去 hkbu 便想著要來吃的

芝士焗茄醬矮瓜意粉

yum yum yum

:)

下午去了hy 朋友的 sample sale

再到 tst

再到 c 家

nn 真的很可愛喔

xoxoxo

>>June 28, 2009 at 3:02:13 PM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 25 日 星期四 【晴】

rr bridal shower

恭喜你呢!

今天你的裙很漂亮

可以嘗試一些 colorful clothes 喔!

謝謝 f 的 arrangement


今天下午到機場 written test

我想他們並不會聘用我

這個 post

應該需要一些 senior

英文很好的人...........

不過也總算是一個很好的 exercise

:)

>>June 28, 2009 at 2:55:33 PM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 24 日 星期三 【晴】

王子生日快樂

祝你跟他每天甜甜蜜蜜

:)

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pole dance - 第三課

舊動作
1) stand, 雙手拿 pole, 吸氣, 呼氣大腿夾著 pole, 向下 slide


新動作

1) 雙手拿 pole, 雙腳拍埋, 把身體捐向 pole 的方向, 頭, chest, upper abdomen, lower abdomen, 一截截的捐

2) 行 ---> step 左腳, 向 pole 內轉, 左手扶 Pole, 放左手, 右腳 Point 腳繼續行 ---> 用 momentum, 雙手拿 pole, 眼快看 pole 位置, 雙腳 jump n squeeze, 用大腿內側夾著 pole, 轉圈而下

3) 行 ---> 左 knee back hook n swing, point toe, 轉到地下時上身躺在地上, 雙手 open horizontally, 雙腿 cycling n naturally cycle both leg to one side, point one leg, 向下俯卧, hip up first, child post, outer leg step out 90 degree, other leg point toe, when up, left hand slide on the left leg

4) Fanling - 左手扶 pole, 左 step, 右 step, 左腳 point toe 向上踢, 右手扶 pole , 左腳向左方下地


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quoted from Terry MacDonald

"Did he stand you up?


Being stood up hurts. There's no way around it, but it's happened to
the best of us.

What's the best way to handle it? Should you call him? Drive past his
house? Show up at his favorite hangout?

No.

Once you do any of these things, you lower your value. You are
perceived as desperate (and you are not desperate).

Sure, it's possible that an emergency prevented him from making your
date. Maybe his mother had to be rushed to the hospital. Maybe his
boss rushed him on a plane to Dallas. Who knows?

It's not your problem. Even if his mother did get sick or he
was forced to leave town, it's still his responsibility to call you
and apologize for not being able to meet. That's it.

Now, say you've been stood up after meeting a great guy at your
favorite bar or bookstore or cafe. What do you do then? Surely I
don't expect you to give up your favorite hangout to avoid running
into this jerk, right?

Right.

It's your bar, bookstore, or cafe. You have as much right (or more)
as he does to go there.

So what do you do if you run into him?

Let him say hello first. If he doesn't say hello, make no attempt to
get his attention. (And if the coward scurries out of the place in the sad
hope that you don't spot him, thank your lucky stars he stood you up
in the first place. He's a loser.)

If he does say hello, smile and play it cool. Say something like,
"Hey, weren't we supposed to get together the other night?" Wait for
his pathetic answer. Enjoy watching him dance for you because dance
he will.

If he offers an excuse, say, "No big deal. I met up with some friends."
Smile as genuinely as possible. Turn on your heel and walk away.

Now, you may be tempted into thinking, "But, Terry, this guy is perfect
for me. We really connected that first night. Maybe I should give
him another chance."

I wouldn't, but if you insist, make him work for that second chance.
If he follows you and asks if he can try again, say, "Eh, you know,
you really seemed like a great guy, but I'm not used to being stood
up."

And walk away.

If he persists and begs for a second chance, say, "I can't promise
anything."

And walk away.

If he calls you, say, "Not this weekend. Maybe next weekend."

If he calls again, agree to meet him someplace you like (and where
you're comfortable). Tell him, "Don't blow it this time."

And see what happens.

The key to this technique is to be willing to walk away. You must
be open to the possibility that just because a man seems like he's
"the one" for you, or because you have so much in common, he still
may not be the right guy.

Your determination not to accept bad behavior is a signal to
the universe that you are willing to accept nothing but the best.

Keep in mind this favorite quote of mine by the author Somerset
Maugham:

"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but
the best, you very often get it."


@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

quoted from Mimi Tanner

"The subject of Birthdays comes up in my book "Calling
Men." Should you call a man on his birthday?? Well,
that depends on a lot of things.

Doing something for a man on the excuse that it's his
birthday is just another way of showing him that you like
him and are going to pursue him - even if he is not
interested in you.

If he hasn't called you in weeks - if you're out of
touch - then don't pipe up with a phone call on his
birthday. It's not necessary and he will not be mad
at you. I promise. If he acts mad later, he's just
blowing smoke. Smile. Don't "call" him on it.

Back to the original question - unless you are
not overly interested in the answer, don't ask a
man what his birthdate is too soon. Early on, it
really shouldn't matter yet. You can read too
much into someone's date of birth before you
might want to know what it is - it may be the
same day of your ex-hubby's, or close to your
dad's birthday - and you don't want a conversation
to go there, or for any significant looks to cross
your face just because of the date of birth of
some man - who may become ultimately less significant
in your life than your garbage collector.

And keep in mind that, especially in the beginning
of your relationship, less is always more."

>>June 28, 2009 at 2:57:22 PM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 23 日 星期二 【晴】

今天跟同事 e 吃飯

她說她認為我的英文沒有問題

只不過是 '欲加之罪, 何患無詞'

她說我們這裡所有的女性都是很直很大女人的

只不過她們在這裡做了很久

所以他不能怎麼樣

而我是新

所以才'蝦' 我

e 說如果事情發生在她身上

她一定會 question 他 definition of english standard

怎樣才算好

提醒他我當時是做了並 pass 了written test 的

說我可以 argue

但我告訴她我不想 argue

為何我好像要 beg the job back wor

i dont want that

她說可能他是潮州人

要人給他面子

哈哈哈

那即是說

我很直, 是大女人, 也不給面子他

這大概就是被解雇的真正原因吧

我告訴 e

對, 我真的很直

而且我想我改不了

也不想去改

大女人嘛

如果大女人 = 有主見, 我行我素

我想我是一半一半

有些事情我可以讓步

有些卻堅持到底

但在愛情的 history 裡

我卻經常被 abuse

我發現我應學習 speak up for myself

學習 set a higher bottom line and stick with it, the current line is too low

培養 self love

anyway

很高興跟你吃飯

it was a very nice lunch

thank you :)

let's keep in touch


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謝謝 dc 的分享

摘自台灣經濟觀測站 (http://www.taiwanecon.com/2009/06/blog-post_08.html)

"我永遠站在「雞蛋」的那方
作者：村上春樹

整理/張翔一 出處：天下雜誌 418期 2009/03

　　以色列政府空襲迦薩，獲頒耶路撒冷文學獎的日本知名小說家村上春樹受到國內外壓力，猶疑是否該出席頒獎，結局是，他去了，並掀起了比小說更為震動世人的餘波。

　　現年六十歲的日本作家村上春樹，被《時代雜誌》喻為當代最具國際影響力的日本作家。

　　村上春樹三度問鼎諾貝爾文學獎，被媒體形容為繼川端康成、大江健三郎之後，「離諾貝爾文學獎最近的日本人」。他包括《挪威的森林》在內的多部長篇小說作品，陸續被翻譯成四十多國語言，全球銷售超過兩千萬冊，近年陸續獲得捷克「卡夫卡文學獎」、愛爾蘭「法蘭克．歐康納國際短篇小說獎」等多項國際文學獎項肯定。

　　今年二月初，村上春樹獲頒耶路撒冷文學獎。該獎項每兩年頒發一次，表彰對人類自由、社會公平、政治民主具貢獻的作家。歷屆得獎者包括西蒙波娃、羅素、米蘭昆德拉等。

　　諷刺的是，頒發獎項的以色列政府，近來空襲迦薩，備受國際和平團體批評。日本輿論因此要求村上春樹為避免被認為支持以色列近來的軍事行動，應拒領該獎項，否則將抵制其作品。

　　但二月十五日，村上春樹在國內外壓力下，仍選擇赴耶路撒冷出席頒獎典禮。他更出人意料地，在以色列總統佩雷斯面前，公開批判以色列的軍事行動，同時一吐作為文學創作者，希望透過描寫微不足道的個人，對抗既有權力和體制的深層意義。

　　村上春樹於耶路撒冷的英語演講辭「永遠站在雞蛋的那方」，道出個人應有的道德勇氣、與對體制霸權的深刻反省，隨即被國際媒體競相轉載，更超越文壇，在國際政治、人權組織間引起廣大迴響。

以下是村上春樹演講辭全文翻譯：

　　今天我以一名小說家的身分來到耶路撒冷。而小說家，正是所謂的職業謊言製造者。

　　當然，不只小說家會說謊。眾所周知，政治人物也會說謊。外交官、將軍、二手車業務員、屠夫和建築師亦不例外。但是小說家的謊言和其他人不同。沒有人會責怪小說家說謊不道德。相反地，小說家愈努力說謊，把謊言說得愈大愈好，大眾和評論家反而愈讚賞他。為什麼？

　　今天，我不打算說謊

　　我的答案是：藉由高超的謊言，也就是創作出幾可亂真的小說情節，小說家才能將真相帶到新的地方，也才能賦予它新的光輝。

　　在大多數的情況下，我們幾乎無法掌握真相，也無法精準的描繪真相。因此，必須把真相從藏匿處挖掘出來，轉化到另一個虛構的時空，用虛構的形式來表達。

　　但是在此之前，我們必須先清楚知道，真相就在我們心中的某處。這是小說家編造好謊言的必要條件。

　　今天，我不打算說謊。我會盡可能地誠實。我在一年之中只有幾天不會說謊，今天剛好就是其中之一。

　　請容我告訴你們真相。

　　在日本，許多人建議我不要來這裡接受耶路撒冷文學獎。甚至有人警告我，如果我堅持前來，他們會聯合抵制我的小說。主要的原因，當然是迦薩正在發生的激烈戰鬥。

　　根據聯合國調查，在被封鎖的迦薩城內，已經有超過千人喪生，許多人是手無寸鐵的平民、孩童和老人。

　　我收到獲獎通知後，不斷問自己：此時到耶路撒冷接受文學獎，是否正確？這會不會讓人認為我支持衝突中的某一方，或認為我支持一個發動壓倒性武力攻擊的國家政策？老實說，我也不想看到自己的書被抵制。

　　經過反覆思考，我還是決定來到這裡。原因之一是，太多人反對我來。我和許多小說家一樣，總是要做人們反對的事情。如果有人對我說，尤其是警告我說，「不要去」、「不要這麼做」，我通常反而會特別想去、特別想做。

　　這就是小說家的天性。小說家是特別的族群，除非親眼所見，親手觸摸，否則他們不會相信任何事情。

　　我來到這裡，我選擇親身面對而非置身事外；我選擇親眼目睹而非矇蔽雙眼；我選擇開口說話，而非沉默不語。

　　但是這不代表我要發表任何政治訊息。判斷對錯，當然是小說家的重要責任，但如何傳遞判斷，每個作家有不同的選擇。我個人偏好用故事、尤其用超現實的故事來表達。因此，我今天不會在你們面前發表任何直接的政治訊息。

　　不過，請容我在這裡向你們傳達一個非常私人的訊息。這是我創作時永遠牢記在心的話語。我從未將這句話真正行諸文字或貼在牆壁，而是刻劃在我心靈深處的牆上。這句話是這樣的：

　　「以卵擊石，在高大堅硬的牆和雞蛋之間，我永遠站在雞蛋那方。」

　　無論高牆是多麼正確，雞蛋是多麼地錯誤，我永遠站在雞蛋這邊。

　　誰是誰非，自有他人、時間、歷史來定論。但若小說家無論何種原因，寫出站在高牆這方的作品，這作品豈有任何價值可言？

　　這代表什麼意思呢？轟炸機、戰車、火箭和白磷彈就是那堵高牆；而被它們壓碎、燒焦和射殺的平民則是雞蛋。這是這個比喻的其中一層涵義。

　　更深一層的看，我們每個人，也或多或少都是一枚雞蛋。我們都是獨一無二，裝在脆弱外殼中的靈魂。你我也或多或少，都必須面對一堵名為「體制」的高牆。體制照理應該保護我們，但有時它卻殘殺我們，或迫使我們冷酷、有效率、系統化地殘殺別人。

　　是我們創造了體制

　　我寫小說只有一個原因，就是給予每個靈魂尊嚴，讓它們得以沐浴在陽光之下。故事的目的在於提醒世人，在於檢視體制，避免它馴化我們的靈魂、剝奪靈魂的意義。我深信小說家的職責就是透過創作故事，關於生死、愛情、讓人感動落淚、恐懼顫抖或開懷大笑的故事，讓人們意識到每個靈魂的獨一無二和不可取代。這就是我們為何日復一日，如此嚴肅編織小說的原因。

　　我九十歲的父親去年過世。他是位退休老師和兼職的和尚。當他在京都的研究所念書時，被強制徵召到中國打仗。

　　身為戰後出生的小孩，我很好奇為何他每天早餐前，都在家中佛壇非常虔誠地祈禱。有一次我問他原因，他說他是在為所有死於戰爭的人們祈禱，無論是戰友或敵人。看著他跪在佛壇前的背影，我似乎感受到周遭環繞著死亡的陰影。

　　我父親過世了，帶走那些我永遠無法盡知的記憶。但環繞他周遭那些死亡的陰影卻留在我的記憶中。這是我從他身上繼承的少數東西之一，卻也是最重要的東西之一。

　　今天，我只希望能向你們傳達一個訊息。我們都是人類，超越國籍、種族和宗教，我們都只是一枚面對體制高牆的脆弱雞蛋。無論怎麼看，我們都毫無勝算。牆實在是太高、太堅硬，也太過冷酷了。戰勝它的唯一可能，只來自於我們全心相信每個靈魂都是獨一無二的，只來自於我們全心相信靈魂彼此融合，所能產生的溫暖。

　　請花些時間思考這點：我們每個人都擁有獨特而活生生的靈魂，體制卻沒有。我們不能允許體制剝削我們，我們不能允許體制自行其道。體制並未創造我們：是我們創造了體制。

　　這就是我想對你們說的。

　　我很感謝能夠獲得耶路撒冷文學獎。我很感謝世界各地有那麼多的讀者。我很高興有機會向各位發表演說。 "


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Quoted from "The Power of Now" (pg. 68)

"Question: Can you give some more examples of ordinary unconsciousness?

Answer: See if you can catch yourself complaining, in either speech or thought, about a situation you find yourself in, what other people do or say, your surroundings, your life situation, even the weather. To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconsious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the siutaiion by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.

Ordinary unconsciousness is always linked in some way with denial of the Now. The Now, of course, also implies the here. Are you resisting your here and now? Some people would always rather be somewhere else. Their "here" is never good enough. Through self-observation, find out if that is the case in your life. Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your herrr and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourslef from the situation, change it, or acccept it totally. if you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose one of those three options, and you must choose now. Then accept the consequences. No excuses. No negativity. No psychic pollution. Keep your inner space clear.

If you take any action - leaving or changing your situation - drop the negativitiy first, if at all possible. Action arising out of insight into what is required is more effective than action arising out of negativity.

Any action is othen better than no action, especially if you have been stuck in an unhappy situation for a long time. If it is a mistake, at least you learn something, in which case it's no longer a mistake. If you remain stuck, you learn nothing. Is fear preventing you from taking action? Acknowledge the fear, watch it, take your attention into it, be fully present with it. Doing so cuts the link between the fearr and your thinking. Don't let the fear rise up into your mind. Use the power of the Now. Fear cannot prevail againist it.

If there is truly nothing that you can do to chagne your here and now, and you can't remove yourself from the situation, then accept your here and now totally by dropping all inner resistance. The false, unhappy self that loves feeling miserable, resentful, or sorry for itself can then no longer survive. THis is called surrender. Surrender is not weakness. There is great strength in it. Only a surrendered person has spiritual power. Through surrender, you will be free internally of the situation. You may then find that the situation changes without any effort on your part. In any case, you are free.

Or is there something that you "should" be doing but are not doing it? Get up and do it now. Alternatively, completely accept your inactivity, laziness, or passivity at this moment, if that is your choice. Go into it fully. Enjoy it. Be as lazy or inactive as you can. If you go ito it fully and consciously, you will soon come out of it. Or may be your won't. Either way, there is no inner conflict, no resistance, no negativity."

>>June 24, 2009 at 9:09:58 AM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 22 日 星期一 【晴】

我要認識多些男性朋友

要謝謝 k

你好犀利呀!

會向你學習 :P

3Q

:)



quoted from mimi tanner

"Most people want to find one wonderful person to spend
their lives with. Sometimes the time is not right for
this - and then suddenly, things can fall into place.
Timing and readiness are very important!

When you are ready to start dating after a breakup
or after time on your own, then try this: take
advantage of more than one way to get together with
someone. Try MANY ways. Not only does this increase
your odds, but it takes the pressure off one particular
fishing line that you have in the water. You won't be
focusing on one thing.

At the same time, increase your friendships with both
men AND women. This too will open up your life to
more opportunities that can seemingly come out of
nowhere.

Then, start getting to know more than one man. When
you are only focused on one man, then things can feel
"too much, too soon." But when you find yourself spending
time with more than one man, it's strange how opportunities
come out of the woodwork.

It's Murphy's Law applied to Romance - when it rains,
it pours. Feast or famine. You are dating one man, then
three more are at your doorstep suddenly. Where were
they 3 months ago? Now you have more guys than you
know what to do with! That's what I mean by Murphy's
Law. There seem to be either not enough great men,
or too many at one time!

But don't be frustrated; consider it a blessing. Your
readiness is paying off. Your readiness attracts men -
as do your efforts to make love happen in your life
by opening yourself up to the opportunities.

Don't be too quick to drop budding friendships with
men just because you think you have something special
with one man. That's the worst possible time to drop
those friendships, in fact. Other men in your life, even
if they are mainly friends (or men you flirt with)
keep you from getting too serious too quickly about
ONE man.

Getting too serious too soon is one of worst things
you can do when you're dating someone. The BEST
way to counteract this natural tendency is to meet
and maintain friendships with other men - and women."



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quoted from terry macdonald

"
Has this ever happened to you?

You're dating a guy. You're crazy about him. He seems crazy about
you. Everything seems to click.

And then, all of a sudden, his calls drop off. He's not as available
to see you.

You start losing sleep: What did you do wrong? And what do you do
next?

You have to do something, right? So, you call him, or you text him.
Maybe you send him a cute card or an email. Maybe you deliberately
"run into" him somewhere.

After all, you clicked with him. You're MEANT to be. Right?

But it doesn't work. Or your efforts work for one night or a few hours,
and then you're back to square one: Trying to get his
attention.

You're thinking, planning, doing.

What's he doing? Who knows. Not very much.

I once knew a woman who dated a very sought-after guy. A lot of
other women wanted to date this guy, and a lot of other guys wanted
to be just like him. I bumped into her one night and said,
"How's Hank (not his real name) doing?"

"He's doing all right" she answered offhandedly, "I don't know
how much longer I'll bother with him. He's not doing very much to
keep us together."

She wasn't too broken up about it, either. She had decided that --
no matter how handsome, successful, popular, whatever he was--
he was going to have to make more of an effort if he wanted to see
HER.

I really respected that. I learned something from it, too.

No matter how great a guy seems, no matter how you seem to click,
to be soulmates, and so on -- if he's not making a serious effort
to not only stay on YOUR radar but to let you know that he CARES
for you, that he wants to be YOUR number one, he's not worth it.

He's a complete waste of time.

Resist all impulses to call, text, OR send postcards from your weekend
in Niagara Falls (he's not worth the postage). You can do better."

對呢

我現在所做的

實在太浪費時間了

停

說實很奇怪

為何一個素未謀面的人

可以這樣的 attached?

這樣的牽動我的情緒?

>>June 23, 2009 at 9:37:05 AM GMT+8