"you must take responsibility for your own happiness and your own sense of self-worth because a man cannot do that for you."
>>July 16, 2009 at 2:37:15 AM GMT+8
2009 年 7 月 13 日 星期一 【晴】
有些時候
一些人一些事一些風景
都會讓我對生命產生強烈的 passion
甚至會感動得熱淚盈眶
以下這篇 speech 是其中一個
很喜歡對 life 充滿 passion 的感覺
>>July 14, 2009 at 7:46:58 AM GMT+8
2009 年 7 月 12 日 星期日 【晴】
朋友哦
我知道這個 blog 越來越多 relationship quotes
我只不過是把它們紀錄在這裡
你們用不著花時間去看的喔!
謝謝 p 提醒我不要把愛情佔了我生命中的這麼多 percentage
絕對贊成
:)
quoted from terry macdonald
""riding someone else's rollercoaster," is......says you're doing when you allow your life to be taken over by someone else's emotional drama.
Now, it's important to be supportive and a good friend, employee, girlfriend. Definitely. If a friend is stuck in an abusive marriage, it's important to do what you can to help.
But once she indicates she won't be helped, it's time to back away. You can't make her leave the relationship, and it's time to focus on YOUR LIFE for a change.
Same with the yay-marriage/nay-marriage guy. At some point, you can't let his emotional struggle take over your life. You have to make yourself available for other men and better opportunities.
And when your boss pulls the rug from under you, it may be time to get your resume together look for a better boss.
One of my biggest weaknesses used to be not recognizing when to walk away from an unwinnable situation and letting it destroy my own happiness.
But I've gotten so much better at it!
When you find yourself riding someone else's rollercoaster, disembark immediately. Then get on a better ride: Your own!"
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quoted from mimi tanner
"5 stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. This has been really helpful to millions of people.
these stages ARE very real in many, many life situations - especially the kind that we DON'T want to happen to us. The order is not set in stone. I personally don't find that anger comes first. I go with Denial and
Bargaining. I think many other women are the same.
And that's where we get ourselves into trouble, because we are trying to literally revive a romance
that is really, really dead.
Denial is when you don't even want to believe that you can't be in touch with this person any more.
That's when you might break my advice and contact someone who is not contacting you. OUCH.
Bargaining is when you spend your own time and mental energy trying to think of ways it can still
work. The brighter you are, the harder you fall in this one...
Then when you hit Depression, that's when you're starting to feel like there is nothing you can
do to change this dude's mind WHATsoever, because it's been a one-sided relationship.
That could be because you showed your hand and overwhelmed the guy with more than he needed to
handle. Before you hit the Anger stage, take heart, and most of all, take care of yourself.
After all, you owe it to yourself to be happy and to give yourself all the love and understanding
that you would give to a best friend. I can't emphasize that enough.
So sit down with yourself and think about what makes YOU happy - and then go do that.
Take care of YOU when you're going through a relationship hurt, because you will ALWAYS have
your relationship with yourself. Give yourself the appreciation that HE is not giving you - because really, you can't count on the OTHER. Love is all about trying to get affirmation from an OTHER. Sometimes that can
really suck. You know you're wonderful, but with the OTHERs, it takes jumping through a lot of social hoops to get to the point where they know you're wonderful.
The very best way you can protect yourself from these matters of the heart is to feel good about yourself and be strong inside so that are ready for what life brings you - ready, meaning, able to fact any situation with confidence - and bravado if necessary.
Don't allow any relationship situation to make you feel intimidated - that is a sign that someone else is crossing the line, in which case you have remedies to get them to back down or back off.
Start your every day with getting in touch with your heart and your potential and/or your history of accomplishment.
Don't chase after men - wait for the ones who care enough to come after you. Spend the same energy that you would spend thinking about a man who's not calling you - on working on yourself. You have plenty to do every day to live your life and make it the best it can be."
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quoted from Mirabelle Summers
"
When you have enough confidence to go around, you just have this
deep sense of self-assurance that translates into undeniable
SEXINESS. You have no qualms about mingling with the world out
there, and you're well capable of engaging in a witty conversation
with the next hot guy that comes within your radar.
(And believe me sister, they'll be arriving in droves!)
Self-confidence frees you from endlessly comparing yourself to
other women. You're not distracted from thoughts like "I'm not
good enough" or "If only I was (insert desired trait here)".
You know that kind of thinking is a WASTE of energy and you're
better off focusing your efforts on other productive things, like
seizing life by the horns.
In short, self-confidence bestows you the powers of a modern
superwoman: a self-referenced attitude as well as a humorous and
upbeat take on life.
Ready for the challenge? Your training begins here:
Isn't it true that having a rich, social circle makes you a
well-rounded person? It isn't hard to imagine that being a
sociable woman subsequently boosts her irresistibility as well.
Yet, there's a tiny caveat to this: having too many guy pals can
actually DIMINISH your attractive potential. Isn't that the
craziest thing to hear?
However, it's true - having friends is fine, but there is a great
risk for a woman to damage her capacity for being attractive to
guys if she gets too used to acting in certain ways towards men.
I know that sounds different from what you may know, but hear me
out on this one. Think about it: it can make you complacent by
being simply content with dealing with guys in a perpetually
platonic manner.
Pretty soon, you could very well write off your love life as a
"distant possibility", never reaching full realization. What that
simply means is that it's very possible to condition yourself to
never be in a "more than friends" way of thinking.
By your own devices, you can condemn yourself to a life of
singlehood because you've gotten so used treating men as "harmless"
companions who could never fulfill any ROMANTIC expectations
whatsoever.
That's not to say that EVERY guy you know should always be hitting
on you, because that would be plain silly. Rather, I want you to
develop a sensible kind of discernment between which guys could
make a good boyfriend, and of course those who are filed under "L"
for Let's Just Be Friends.
So you see, it's not a matter of making all men in your life a
potential soulmate. Instead, we should be in the business of
sharpening our natural radar for quality men out there.
When you don't make an effort to make this conscious distinction,
you're needlessly letting your senses dull. Then, you'll wonder
why there are no good men out there.
Trust me, they're out there. It's just that we have to keep a
skillful EYE out for these fine guys.
Therefore, developing a keen radar will serve as the basis for
acting towards the different kinds of guys in your life. For
instance, you should have an instinct for flirtation instead of
treating all guys like a friend.
Otherwise, you'll always be used to NOT attracting a man even if he
doesn't fall under the "friends category". Worse, being entrenched
in such an outlook will just make you NEEDY for male attention.
That's not a good impression to make on men, believe me.
What happens is that you'll be so used to putting out that
friendship vibe to the point where NO GUY could ever see you as a
romantic pursuit. The worst part is, you could be doing these
things and not even KNOW it!
Basically, too many guy pals can be like an unseen crutch which can
make you too lazy and actually try to attract the suitable members
of the male populace.
Oh, and here's another danger of spending too much time with your
male friends: they could be mistakenly identified by potential
suitors as obstacles to your affections. Think about it: if a hot
guy sees you surrounded by other guys, he'll think that you're
bringing them along as protection.
Not a good vibe to put out, right? Here's the deal: during ancient
times, people lived in tribes of only a hundred people and men
looking to pair with women in the community had to be VERY careful.
Though things have changed in the present day, men are still wary
of women who have companions that could very well HURT him in some
way.
If the "top dog" of the pack found out that some dude was hitting
on his woman, he and his friends will give the poor guy a
butt-whooping he'll remember for a long time to come (granted of
course, he'll be alive to relish the experience!).
So, this deep-embedded fear still runs deep within a modern man's
consciousness. Even if the men around you don't have any romantic
interests in you, the platonic instinct to protect a "sister" may
be at work instead.
Look at those "big brother/younger sister" relationships - your
"protectors" could conclude that no guy could ever be good enough
for you. They'll disapprovingly shoo away any potential suitor who
is less than 110% perfect in their eyes.
So my basic point today is for you to go on and have your awesome
group of friends, but just remember to stay in touch with your
feminine side. Being too much like "one of the boys" can be
harmful to your dating life.
Keep it BALANCED and don't forget that you should also spend equal
time with fellow women as well. In many ways, they can help your
feminine energies flourish. You'll need that womanly essence to
make you more attractive to men everywhere.
You may not notice it, but the influence of your gal pals will
gradually change you from "I'm just a friend" to "Come and get me".
Female friends are the best way to help you stay in touch with the
flirty, carefree, fun-loving side yourself that men LOVE!"
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