2004 年 11 月 25 日 星期四 【晴】

大名： 培正健社人
電郵： [email protected]
說： 呢位小妹妹....請問妳係咪真係培正學生??如果唔係請妳唔好着住培正校服影相仲要post上網,ok?妳唔要面,妳嘅同學,老師,學兄弟姊妹都要面!!
同埋想知道學校知唔知妳有個咁嘅網頁呢?如果唔知嘅話我相信要send比校方跟進.
PS:寫日記唔緊要,但係唔pos相呀小姐,妳副尊容真係......妳真係好勇!!

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

在情在理，我都應該稱呼你做我的師兄，對嗎？
我不明白，穿著培正校服拍照，及把照片放在互聯網上有什麼問題。
在我的角度而言，我認為只要我不是把校服穿成是什麼「制服誘惑」那個樣子（即是把裙弄得短短的，衣衫不整的樣子＜－這才是不尊重）
我哪方面的行為令到我的老師，同學，家人蒙羞呢？
這個網頁是我的個人日記，與學校無關，幹麼把學校牽進這件事情內呢？假如你聽罷我的解釋，依舊覺得有問題，那你就做你想做的事，我沒有權阻止你。若是校方問我這件事，我也只會把今天我對你說的這番話重新說一次。我無愧於心，我不介意你通知校方。到頭來，大家也會發現，這其實是一件很少的事。
在我認識的培正學生當中，有不少人也有網上日記，亦有拍了照片放在網上，當中不乏穿著校服拍的。你需要我一一告訴你他們日記的網址嗎？假若你覺得我把自己的校服照放在網上有問題的話，那麼他們也有問題唷！是否應一同「懲處」呢？
這個是我的日記，我愛放照片上來就放上來，這與你無關。你不喜歡看的話，就不要進來我這個網頁。我從來也不會強迫別人來這裡看我的日記，請你別過問我在這兒張照的一切相片。

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： 家健~~
電郵： [email protected]
說： 我唔係泳隊,不過每晚放工就係九龍公園游水,.....頭髮長就cut 短佢啦~~~好似張柏芝個首"不一樣的我"都唔錯架~~~haha

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

你公司好近九龍公園？！我唔鐘意游公眾游泳池～ｃｏｘ太ｄｉｒｔｙ了～ｄ　水質我真係接受唔到～雖然我可以去會所游～不過個會所係香港島＞．＜ｂｕｔ我住九龍半島啵．．．
之前有排試過短頭髮（ｄｉｍ膊頭對我黎講都叫做好短嫁喇～因為我由小４到ｅ＋都係長頭髮嫁．．．）ｂｕｔ覺得唔ｍａｔｃｈ自己個面形～所以依家選擇留番長ｌｕ～

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： rlcw
電郵： [email protected]
說： Just want to say ... be brave ..

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

I am always brave. BTW, would you mind telling me who are u?

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： GUILE
電郵： [email protected]
說： 點解你成日都頭痛 or 頭暈既?

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

可能係因為貧血～又或者唔夠訓吧．．．．．又或者係太多野諗．．．我都唔知唷＞．＜

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

尋晚溫到１點３３分～都只係溫左ｃｈａｐｔｅｒ７同埋８（５０％）～＊臨訓前，我ｓｅｔ　左ａｌａｒｍ　４：４５分～我原本好累嫁～１：３５分攤左係張床度．．．點知訓極都訓唔到啵～＊就係咁樣唔知過左幾耐．．．．２：１０分收到ｃ先生既電話～好ｓｕｒｐｒｉｓｅ點解佢會打黎．．．．佢唔係覺得同我冇野好傾嫁咩？？我地大家都明白到我地係２個世界既人。。。‧‧我好想同佢傾～好想聽佢想講咩野．．．．只不過，測驗考試始終最緊要，我呢排精神已經差到極點，我唔敢再剝削我僅餘既訓覺時間～所以我狠下心咁同佢講：「我聽日要ｔｅｓｔ　ａｒ我要早ｄ訓如果唔係唔夠精神嫁喇～」唉～＊唔捨得收線都要嫁喇．．．之後我過左唔知幾耐就訓左ｌｕ～

４：４５分～ａｌａｒｍ響．．．．．ｍａｒｋ大眼，見到房門既門縫透進１點點ｇｅ光～＊我就知道我ｄａｄ仲係廳～未訓．．．．＞．＜唉＊我想落床溫書都唔得．．．．

結果我６點９先起身～第１件事即刻落床溫書，心諗：死喇～仲有咁多未溫～＊得番果少少時候邊夠嫁．．．．．結果我１路食早餐～１路溫書～係有野食住的情況底下～加上壓力勁大既時候（因為我知道時間無多）我溫書係特別快ｄ嫁～但都係溫唔晒（今次的範圍係ｃｈａｐｔｅｒ　７～１０）結果番到去用晒２個小息黎溫～＊ｌｕｎｃｈ之前果堂就測左ｂｉｏ　ｌｕ～＊唉．．．

>>November 25, 2004 at 6:11:58 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 24 日 星期三 【晴】

大名： 家健~~
電郵： [email protected]
說： sorry 呀~~岩岩路過此地~~見到你的日記,我覺得你而家唔好再諗其他野喇~~不如你去做運動啦~~
e.g.游水(我一年365日都去游架),打排球,學打拲...等等
運動完出身汗,好累就訓...就會咩都唔諗架喇~~~呵呵~~
仲有呀~~男朋友冇左唔緊要,因為你都唔係差,而且你得個16歲,一定會搵到個好過佢既~~有時一個人冇拘冇(出)都幾free 架~~

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

咦～＊點解你會有我日記既ｌｉｎｋ既！？你係ｓｅｎｄ　ｅｍａｉｌ去ｙａｈｏｏ俾我果個人嗎？！ｏｒ第２個人？ｓｏｒｒｙ～＊唔知點解呢排好多人話係我日記既長期讀者．．．．．搞到我依家都唔知邊個打邊個了＞．．．＜

點解你１年３６５日都會去ｓｗｉｍｍｉｎｇ　ｇｅ？你係泳隊？？你去邊度游嫁？游水我唔係唔識～但係我嫌麻煩～次次去游水之前又要準備１大輪野～我ｄ頭髮咁長～又唔ｌｉｋｅ　ｕｓｅ　泳帽啵～＊所以次次游完水又要好小心咁樣梳理把頭髮＞．．．．＜前前後後都要３個鐘～＊呢排有打算跑下步咁！！但係由於精神唔好既關係，日日都頭暈都喊．．．．所以冇落到街跑步ｌａｗ～

我都知～我第時總會搵到第２個ｇｅ～不過係呢段過渡期裡面，１個人好辛苦ｌａｗ～係就係ｆｒｅｅ　ｄ～唔使顧慮咁多～但始終冇左１個可以同我好ｃｌｏｓｅ既男仔．．．．．

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： NuL
電郵： [email protected]
說： I am sicked of you now...
If I can choice... I would like not to be understanding you that much...
At least, I can be friend with your lies and fuken faked face....

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

I can't control how much u understand me 2.....
I know you're the one who is always worried about me.
You treat me with your real heart...I know I should have apperciated for what you have done to me
but I just don't wanna somebody who "control" me.
If you understand me very well, why don't you leave me alone?
You know what I need; and you know what I HATE !
Can't you hear the voice form my heart?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

６：００佢打左俾我～＊聽到佢把聲真係好ａｒ．．．．唉～＊有太多野唔可以係度講。

今日ｍａｇｇｉｅ係第１個小息既時候行埋黎～＊
佢問我：師姐，你睇完精神科醫生ａｒ？！
我話：係ａｒ～＊不過依家冇事喇！！
ｋａｋａ～身邊既人唔好擔心我喇～！我冇事ａｒ～

ｌｕｎｃｈ同Ｎａｎａ出左去食～我食呢個魚鮫麵～佢就食墨丸河～ｔｈｅｎ１齊去ｏｋ買雪條食．．．．．好飽ｌｅ～沿途碰到丫昇．．．．ｋａｋａ大家都好快認到對方！！我對住佢笑左１笑就算喇～因為佢ｄ　ｆｄ係度～費事尷尬喇．．．＞．＜

ｅｌａｍ的ｂｆ係澳洲番左黎～＊我見ｅ琳呢排日日都神采飛揚～１睇就知道日日都甜到漏喇～＊希望佢地以後都會咁開心喇！！好好珍惜可以相見的日子．．．．

唉～＊見到ｅ琳咁開心．．．．真的有點．．．．．．次次佢最開心既時候，就係我最唔開心既果段日子．．．．ｆｕｎｎｙ？！還是天意弄人？

番去係２堂ｇｅ　ａｍａｔｈｓ～我訓死左．．．．．結果係咁俾人鬧．．．．．平時又唔見佢鬧我啵～淨係今日先鬧．．．有病嫁佢．．．．

>>November 24, 2004 at 6:23:01 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 23 日 星期二 【晴】

今日第１堂就測ｅｃｏｎ～＊唉．．．．．１５／２０．．．姐係７５分囉～＊

成日個頭都好痛．．．痛到想死果隻．．．．真係無論我幾努力都唔可以令自己清醒ｄ～＊我真係累到想死．．．．個頭痛到我唔知點咁～個人好ｍｕｎｇ好想發脾４．．．但係我知我唔應該咁樣對待我身邊ｇｅ人～所以我忍．．．我叫自己唔好發脾氣～以免自己講左ｄ唔經大腦ｇｅ野，ｈｕｒｔ到人．．．．．

旅行分組～我都唔知我自己係邊組～係ｍａｇｇｉｅ定係匡婷呢？！唉．．．．唔知道．．．．．聽日先算吧！！

ｃｈｅｍ堂做ｌａｂ～ｐｕｉ唔覺意整爛左支ｔｅｓｔ　ｔｕｂｅ仲介到手添～＊好彩冇咩血．．．．ｂｕｔ冬天整親手好痛嫁～真係慘慘ｌｕ＊

ｌｕｎｃｈ同ｐｕｉｐｕｉ食～ｋａｋａ特別嗚謝ｈｏｎｇ　＋　ｄｅｎｎｉｓ幫我地買飯～＊我如ｐｕｉ２個人１個ｌｕｎｃｈ　ｂｏｘ都可以好辛苦咁先叫做勉強食得晒（我仲要係食到想嘔果隻．．．＞．＜唔係ｄ野唔好食～而且我食唔落咁多．．．．）身邊ｇｅ人，個個都叫我唔好再諗住以前果個男朋友．．．．但係我仲未放得低～＊我唔想換左手提的ｗａｌｌｐａｐｅｒ～因為我好想見到佢．．．．．

放左學測ｃｈｅｍ～ｏｈ．．．．今次大炒．．．．死喇！！諗緊之後果幾次要加倍努力，如差不多囉滿分先可以保得住我ｃｈｅｍ全級起碼有ｔｏｐ　５的位置．．．．．

放學番黎，發覺原來新買果個袋唔係太ａｆｆｏｒｅ到重野～死喇．．．．諗緊聽日番學用唔用果個袋好呢？！ｂｕｔ唔通我又買過個咩？！冇錢喇．．．．．

其實我有諗過番ｐａｒｔｉｍｅ嫁～教琴都幾好＊但我怕我自己未夠料去教人．．．．或者係因為以前我的ｐｉａｎｏ　ｔｅａｔｈｅｒ教得好好～所以我怕我自己既表現唔及佢ａｒ．．．但我又好想搵ｄｄ錢．．．因為我份人唔鐘意問屋企人囉錢～寧願自己唔夠錢就唔食野都唔會問佢地囉．．．．．．唉～＊點算好呢？！

I am dating with different guys....
hanging out with them all the day and go to different places....
But I can't find a sense of comfort>.<
just loney....nothing but loney.....
I am really tired.....I need somebody who loves me more then I love him.....
I need somebody who's tall and handsome, so I can hug him and gain the warm and support from him.
I don't care how long will my coming love affair be, I just want it to come quicker.
I don't wanna be alone.
However, there is no "free lunch" in this world.
Who will love such a bad person like me? Nobody!
If I doin't learn to give my love and concern, nobody will love me.......
I'll be alone forever....>.<
I look really tired and ugly....I have lost all my confidence......

>>November 23, 2004 at 10:49:16 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 22 日 星期一 【晴】

大名： 霈
電郵： [email protected]
說： 一 個 挫 折 不 能 使 你 跌 倒 的 ! @ 站 起 來 吧 :>

你 的 精 神 科 醫 生 對 你 說 了 甚 麼 呢 ^ ^ ?
其 實 天 父 就 是 最 好 的 醫 生 呢 ＋

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

謝謝ｐｕｉｐｕｉ在這個假期內都好似平時咁關心我ｌｅ～＊
我果個精神醫生好廢ｌａｗ～我係睇完醫生果晚同我ｄａｄ傾左好多好多野．．．發現原來我同我ｄａｄ係性格上面有好多野係ｉｎ　ｃｏｍｍｏｎ嫁啵～＊大家都係世界上面比較少有果類人。。。‧‧‧我亦都明白到有ｄ野，１係就接受唔好怨，１係就改～我應該自己去揀定１條路～唔好成日３心２意．．．．．如果唔係會搞到自己同埋身邊既人都好辛苦。
其實我諗，只要自己了解自己真真正正內心係想點的話～咩心病都可以迎刃而解。或者有人ｄ係唔可以靠自己去了解自己的話～會選擇禱告。但我份人就係唔鐘意靠人，所以我覺得呢個認識自我的ｐｒｏｃｅｓｓ最好都係靠自己去做吧．．．．．
但我知道ｐｕｉｐｕｉ都係唔想我諗埋一邊，辛苦自己吧！！ｋａｋａ你的好意我是知道的．．．．

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

今朝５點就起左身～因為又夢見他了．．．．．．好掛住佢．．．．．但係我知道我唔應該再ｋｅｅｐ住同佢咁ｇｅ．．．．．ｃａｎｄｉｃｅ講得ａｒｍ～嗯！！我要錫自己ａｒ．．．＞．＜但我淨係識講卻不會做．．．．

好彩有人陪我傾ｔｅｌ～傾到７點幾收線起身食早餐～溫ｃｈｅｍ～上網打機．．．．

ａｆｔｅｒｎｏｏｎ　３點～個頭激痛．．．痛到我忍唔住攤左係張床上面．．．．又發冷發熱．．．．但仲有好多ｃｈｅｍ未溫熟．．．．．

５點半打去叫醒２隻懶訓豬～點知佢地今日出奇地乖啵！！自動自覺起了身～＊我約左佢地７點係ｍｋ～打完ｔｅｌ就去沖涼洗頭～依家開始凍喇．．．所以ｍｅ今日著短裙　＋　黑色絲襪（雖然係就係好似誇左少少～不過因為我費事自己再病多幾錢重喇．．．．）

企左係ｍｋ火車站等左十幾分鐘先見人～ｔｈｅｎ行去太子１間ｃａｆｅ飲野．．．．．其實就係咁樣傾２咀．．時間過得好快．．．．我亦都好開心，唔使１個人唔知去邊好．．．．

走的時候仲有藍莓送我番屋企～ｋａｋａ～佢尋日踢完波都死左半條人命，真係有點不好意思ｌｅ～之後佢仲１丁友番去ｍｋ．．．＞．＜嘿嘿！！我終於知道點樣先可以同男仔做到朋友．．．係單純ｇｅ朋友啵．．．．以前ｇｅ我，識親ｄ男仔，冇ｆｅｅｌ的就連朋友都做唔到；１係就識左唔夠幾日就溝人ｏｒ被人溝．．．．．

回到家換了３，吃飯～＊之後ｆｕ　ｍａｓｋ（因為唔夠訓所以出暗瘡ｌｅ．．．．）ｆｕ完之後上網～＊就咁又１日了．．．．．

>>November 22, 2004 at 10:16:11 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 21 日 星期日 【晴】

大名： 好耐無來你到留下言~
電郵： [email protected]
說： 星期6見到你先知你咁高~_~""
同我差不多高炸,好利害的女女=.= 我見好多女女都係唔高.....haha
點都好la~~朋友唔洗急搵嫁~因為用心識既朋友,先係王道~
o(＞0＜)o

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

ｋａｋａ～其實我想像中既你係高ｄ嫁～尋日見你都唔覺得你好高．．．．

呢１刻，我或者會覺得，我唔想再去搵朋友喇。
我選擇過１個人既生活～＊就係因為我呢個選擇，我會勸自己以後唔好因為覺得自己冇朋友而唔開心～因為呢條路係我揀ｇｅ～＊

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


今日去左睇ａｋ果個藍莓踢波．．．．．．ｋａｋａ佢就ｏｋｅｙ～不過佢果隊ｇｅ人．．．．別提吧！！一諗起就把鬼火＞．＜不如我落場喇～起碼我跑得快過佢地～嘩ｋａｋａ～超自大！！

行番去新城市果度附近的茶餐廳食野～＊我食左個西多士　＋　凍奶茶～＊藍莓問我點解可以咁快就冇事～＊其實我都唔知點解ａｒ．．．．．或者．．．．．

之後去左睇「公主復仇記」～＊嗯～＊我個人覺得幾好睇啵～只係略嫌冇乜高潮位咁～＊ｋａｋａ～但我好鐘意吳彥祖既角色．．．．真係好鐘意．．．．因為我心目中的男人同佢都差不多咁壞～＊男人就是這樣吧！！起碼大部份有能力令到我愛上佢既男人都係咁＊男人唔壞女人唔愛～＊呢個正正係我ｇｅ寫照吧！！

ｔｈｅｎ藍莓要番工ａｒ～我就搭火車走ｌｕ～唔知點解，今日藍莓雖然遲左成個鐘先黎～搞到我要１個人係新城市果度走來走去～係機舖果度睇人打機，無聊到死．．．．你估我ｄ時間好多ａｒ？！但或者係因為我對藍莓真係１ｄ鐘意ｇｅ感覺都冇，只係好普通咁當係ｆｄ～所以我對佢要求唔高．．．．我對朋友的要求不嬲都唔高～但係對男朋友既要求就會好高～＊我要我既男朋友錫我就我．．．．．做唔到的話我係１定會忍受唔到，最後都係分手收場。

尋日聽完阿明講ｇｅ一番話之後～再加上我同我ｄａｄ傾ｇｅ一番話．．．．．我明白到自己需要ｄ咩野。。‧‧嗯～＊假如我搵唔到１個真係愛我ｇｅ人，我會寧願要１個有錢ｇｅ男仔～比我高１個ｌｅｖｅｌ的～即刻我知道佢對我冇感情都好，大家各取所需就算喇～＊或者我咁諗真係有ｄ變態，外人會覺得我唔愛自己．．．但．．．．我已經決定左．．．．

>>January 6, 2005 at 2:08:28 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 20 日 星期六 【晴】

今日１２點３去左睇醫生～傻嫁．．．．＄１２００～好ｑ貴囉！！我真係唔想去睇嫁～只係因為唔想屋企人擔心我既情緒同埋心理問題我先去睇嫁～＊死喇！！２個星期之後又要番去覆診。。。我感覺上呢個ｅ生唔係好掂～佢好似傻下傻下咁～都幫唔到我ｄ咩。

睇完ｅ生之後去左搵ｅｘｂｆ～＊囉番ｄ野～又幫佢整ｄ野～ｔｈｅｎ就去左搵阿明～＊ｋａｋａ～ｆｉｒｓｔ　ｔｉｍｅ　ｃ　ｈｉｍ～其實我係ｉｃｑ都識左佢２年嫁喇～係我開始寫日記ｇｅ時候，我就已經識佢。

我同阿明去左ｐｏｋｅｒ　ｃａｆｅ果度食ｄ野～果陣係好似４點幾～＊ｂｕｔ我仲未食ｌｕｎｃｈ～ｔｈｅｎ　１齊傾下計～之後又講到我ｌａ～佢問我點解會同我前男朋友分手．．．．．其實我都明ｇｅ～我自己對感情都唔係好認真，係未了解人地之前就同人１齊～我識左我ｅｘｂｆ都唔夠１個星期就１齊左．．．．唉～＊算喇！！過左去喇

我呢排傻左～成日傻食～講野激無聊～＊成日都扮傻仔～又成日搵ｆｄ出黎！！日日都搵唔同ｇｅ人～鬼唔知咁樣唔好咩？！我知我係度ｋｉｌｌ　ｔｉｍｅ～但係我真係好需要人地陪我～費事自己係度亂諗野。所有人依家見到ｇｅ只係我既假面具．．．．．真正ｇｅ我會消失．．．．．

>>November 20, 2004 at 10:48:31 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 19 日 星期五 【晴】

ｂｏｏｋ左ａｐｐｏｉｎ＿ｍｅｎ＿，聽日１２點１５分去睇醫生．．．．．

我知道自己精神已經撐唔到＿去～繼續係咁的話～我真係會顛．．．．

ｅ琳的男朋友係澳洲番左黎～＊見到佢地幸福開心既樣～我真係好羨慕。

有時我會係度諗，點解人地可以一齊咁耐，但我偏偏就冇咁既經歷．．．．．

或者我份人太喜歡新鮮感喇！！又成日自我中心．．總之我就唔係１個好ｇｅ女朋友。

其實我覺得自己要求唔算高，我只係想對方起碼高過我５ｃｍ到～英文唔差～了解我體諒我～有責任感～（唔好應承左人又做唔到）～肯照顧我就夠喇（我指的照顧唔係經濟上的支持～而係精神上既支持）～個樣ｏｋｅｙ令仔～衣著唔使好ｉｎ都冇問題嫁！！

可能我自己的質素太差吧．．．．具備以上條件ｇｅ人都唔會睇得上我．．．．．

我太令人生厭了．．．

>>November 19, 2004 at 6:38:24 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 18 日 星期四 【晴】

大名： 路人
電郵： [email protected]
說： Who are " really " care about you?
Do you know the answer?

It is hoped you will respond that they are Nul and all the fds around you !
I think not your ex-bf who gave up you. He had already dated with another girl .

You don't know who I am. Though I am just a person who always come here , hope you will accept my comment !

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

我明白，邊個先係真正關心我既人。
起碼我好相信，我屋企人１定係最關心我既人～至於朋友同埋ｎｕｌ～我明白佢地既心意ｇｅ．．．．．
ｂｔｗ，你有我ｉｃｑ嫁／！

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

放學的時候，有個看似係大６落黎既女人向我問路～＊ｋａｋａ好彩佢問ｇｅ係何文田廣場姐～如何唔係我呢個路癡都唔知點幫到佢！！～

今日放早～＊４點幾約左ｃ先生問佢囉番ｄ野．．．我搭９號車好準時咁樣係４點１５分去到ｃ先生既屋企樓下，之後我打俾佢～佢．．．．佢竟然係ｃｗｂ工司果度做緊野～好似完全唔記得左約左我。之後我問佢：你記得你今日約左我４點１５分係你樓下嗎？佢話：我記得丫～不過有好多野做，唔記得左打俾你同你講叫你今日唔好黎添～＊我啞左．．．．．．心諗：你當我係咩野ａｒ？！但我冇發佢脾氣，因為我知道就算我發脾氣都冇用．．．．我已經白走１趟了～講咩都係多餘的．．．．而且佢好似好忙咁樣～＊今日係佢第１日番工～我都想佢有個好ｄ既表現。算喇～佢今日太多野要記住要做喇～我呢ｄ咁唔重要的人，唔記得都係正常ｇｅ＞．＜我唯有怨自己蠢吧！！點解唔係出門口之前打個ｔｅｌ俾佢？

我好無奈咁樣，１個人搵路去地鐵站～＊因為我想出ｍｋ～去睇睇朗豪坊到底係點ｇｅ樣子．．．我打左俾ａｋ既ｆｄ～叫佢出黎～＊佢話會即刻出黎．．．．咁我咪去住ｍｋ先囉～我由第１層１路行～行到第７層～見到ｍｕｊｉ就入去睇～順手買左支鉛芯筆。之後見到ｌａｏｓｍｉｄｄｌｅ～咁咪入去睇喇．．．．之後睇ａｒｍ左個ｂｏｘｅｒ　ｂａｇ～＄３６８
～好似有ｄｄ貴咁～不過我舊果個ｓｃｈｏｏｌ　ｂａｇ又壞左～唉！！算喇！！我冇心情去揀～還掂睇ａｒｍ就算喇～

使左錢應該會好開心～但係我１ｄ開心既感覺都冇～只係響商場果度呆下呆下咁行黎行去～行過１ｄ地方，見到１ｄ野，就係度諗：ｃ先生會唔會鐘意呢？得閒又望下鐘～係度諗：ｃ先生係度做緊咩野呢．．．．又或者，每當我做１件事，就係度諗：ｃ先生如果係我身邊睇到我咁做的話～又會唔會鬧我蠢呢？

行左好耐好耐～＊行到腰都痛～腳又累～但係果個ｆｄ都未出黎～所以我打俾佢同佢講我番屋企喇．．．．．朗豪坊咁大～我都行晒喇．．．唉～＊咩野心都冇晒．．．好灰．．．個個都好似唔理我咁．．．我就好似係個波咁～俾人踢來踢去～咁大個女，今日係我第２次俾人放我飛機．．．．．

之後我就由砵蘭街行番屋企～行左足足半個鐘．．．．．係我幫到去ｍｋ火車站果度，無喇喇俾個令仔哥哥捉住我ｓａｌｅ野．．．．勁無奈ｌａｗ～佢話如果我肯聽佢講２０秒～佢就唔使俾老細鬧（因為果陣時有老細企係度睇住佢地ｓａｌｅ野．．．．）我諗：幫下人都好ｇｅ～咁我就聽佢講喇～ｂｕｔ我同佢講，我未夠１８歲～（暗示叫佢唔好向我ｓａｌｅ野～因為我根本就唔會ｂｕｙ～）ｋａｋａ最後我都係ｓｕｃｋ番手上面ｄ野俾佢～ｔｈｅｎ走人ｌｕ

繼續行～行到亞加路街既百佳果度，終於忍唔住～喊左出黎～好彩全條街既人都唔識我．．．．我終於知道咩野叫做「行屍走肉」～原來１個人行路真係可以行到好似冇靈魂咁．．．．ｄ手手腳腳ｆｉｎｇ下ｆｉｎｇ下咁．．．．我經過１間ｐｅｔ　ｓｈｏｐ～我駐足觀看～發現ｄ狗仔真係好可愛．．．佢地比我幸福．．．．

番到屋企～係門口抹乾ｄ眼淚～練習左幾下「笑」～之後先按ｂｅｌｌ～好開心咁同媽咪講：睇下！！我買左個袋ａｒ＊～

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊



Even I am sad
I will smile :::



I know that I look awfully tired...
It's because the fact that I can't sleep well...
I ask myself to go to bed be4 2
but even I am sleeping, my brain keeps working...
I can't control it and this bothers me a lot....



Every day get up in the moring....
I feel really tired >.<
I'm seeking for a harbour to let me rest.....
Someone who can heal my feelings and protect me.....

>>November 18, 2004 at 11:09:10 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 17 日 星期三 【晴】

大名： NuL
電郵： [email protected]
說： Somehow, it's your life.. I would not try to help you to walk your way...
Game is over or not... How do you think? I mean that friend ...not me...i mean all the friend around you...
Just counting... 5 yrs difference... but just like the same stage~ ^____^
It's fun to support this love~
Whatever, It's your life...
I am just saying what I want to say!

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

Well, gmae is over now.
I think that he is not that immature, as he knows very well how to cope with fds.
He just appears a bit selfiish to his girlfriend.
Anyway, game is over.........
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： puipui * : )
電郵： [email protected]
說： have not chat with you for a long time > ? How do you do " :> ?
It is important to give up something you don't enjoy in it - - - +

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

I enjoy the time when he suddenly changes his attitude and become a gentalment.
Just most of the time he isn't .........
Anyway, he has already given up me.......
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： NuL
電郵： [email protected]
說： I just notice that....
Now, Is that you always make up before hanging out with your bf?
Just wondering~

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

No, of cox not !
I wouldn't dare to do something which hurts my skin.....
moreover, I don't know how to make up...and I have no make-up product which are useful at home.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： NuL
電郵： [email protected]
說： 拍得拖,你就要捱得苦...
你唔係缺乏父愛...
只係你...........

算啦...唔想教訓你...
你慢慢沈啦, 沈醒叫我...

真的是深愛嗎? 等~~??? 我想笑 lor..

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

我冇係度要人地黎憐憫我啵～＊我知道，拍得拖就預左有散既１日。我拍左咁多次拖，你覺得我仲會唔會天真到覺得ｅ＋既男朋友就係將來的伴侶？！
你覺得我唔係缺乏父愛，咁係咩野呢？我倒想聽聽你的高見。
我知，我等落去無意思，因為我同佢真係性格不合。
你覺得我係度沈咩？我覺得我好清醒啵～＊我知道自己係度做緊咩野～

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： 臣
電郵： [email protected]
說： Take it easy and Let ie be
, don't forget your dream !
Don't worry , happy time will coming soon ! ^^

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

ｔｈｘ～ｋａｓｏｎ～！嗯～＊謝謝你提醒我，我活著是為了我的夢想。縱使我的夢想好像離我很遠很遠，但並不代表永遠沒有可能。就是因為這個夢想太難實現，我更加應該好好善用我的時間．．．．努力去做１ｄ對我追尋呢個夢想有利的事。
嗯～＊仲有１樣野好想多謝你既就係～原來你成日都有黎睇我日記。真係好開心ｌｅ～

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： nic
電郵： [email protected]
說： 我們仍是朋友
我會關心你
放鬆d
有乜唔開心call me
我知你冇乜朋友

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

尋晚傾完之後，我好左好多嫁喇～要顛都顛完．．．．．只係估唔到你咁快就可以放低我去搵第２個姐～
嗯～＊我會盡力適應１下我既身份．．．．＞．＜謝謝關心！

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

大名： NuL
電郵： [email protected]
說： 見到你的新一篇日記...
我又好想應你...

你一直只愛你的執著...
你懂嗎?

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

你愛說成我怎樣使怎樣吧！！生命是我的，我有權去做我喜歡做的事，即使係自己折磨自己，亦都係我個人的決定。
或者你講既係ａｒｍ～咁又點呢？我仍然都係會繼續咁愛我既執著．．．．．

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

同佢拍拖，就好似走鋼線咁樣～

假如我做錯少少事～就會俾佢１手推落去無底的深淵．．．．．

如今，我真的做錯了１件事～

而結果就是．．．．

我怕怕了。。

看著他的相．．．．看到凌晨．．．．有點累，但那種唔捨得既感覺，１點都冇退下．．．．

到底我愛佢ｄ咩野～愛佢的外表？唔係丫～

但係到底佢仲有ｄ咩野咁令我留戀？我唔知道．．．

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

尋晚佢３點打黎俾我～＊我真係好ｓｕｒｐｒｉｓｅ點解佢會打俾我。佢問我係唔係訓緊。我其實係訓著左，不過係身體訓著左但精神唔係訓緊囉～＊所以佢１打黎我就聽到電話喇～

佢同我講左好多野，當中佢有講到點解要分手。其實佢都講得ａｒｍ既～我同佢跟本性格不合。大家都係對方身上面搵唔到心目中既伴侶既特質，所以慢慢冇晒動力去愛對方，為對方去做任何事。我都明白，大家到左咁既地步，再勉強落去都無意思，所以我都唔應該抱任何希望。但講就易，做就難，１諗起佢，個心就忍忍作痛．．．

我明白到我想得到既男朋友類型唔係佢，而佢想得到既亦都唔係我。同佢傾左３個鐘（果陣時６點喇）之後收線～得番４５ｍｉｎｓ去訓～咁又迷迷糊糊訓到７點１５分～ｏｈ！又有遲到的危險了～好彩最後都冇。

我唔想學校既人知道我心情唔好～但係今日我呆滯的表情出賣左我。。。我今日叫左ｅ琳ａｎｄ　Ｎａｎａ陪我出街食飯～＊平時唔食飯ｇｅ我，都唔知點解無喇喇想食飯～＊

ｅ琳今日食野食得好辛苦ａｒ～＊因為佢生飛滋．．＞．＜等我聽日帶支柚子蜜俾佢先～＊

我好成功咁樣扮到好平靜，仲識同人講下笑添～＊但其實我真係難過得說不出話來。我覺得好累好累．．．．淨係想咩野都唔使諗．．．．．

今日放學番黎見到佢ｉｃｑ的ｉｎｆｏ果度，已經追緊另１個女仔～我唔知我應該有咩反應．．．．．．ａｒｍ既，我依家只係佢既１個普通朋友，佢既感情事我最好唔好過問．．．．

>>November 17, 2004 at 8:52:55 PM GMT+8

2004 年 11 月 16 日 星期二 【晴】

他跟我說分手。。‧‧

我呆住了！

我努力改變了這麼多～換來的仍是這個結果。

我崩潰了～但他卻沒有半點的傷～心痛得不敢流淚．．．．

因為我怕他責怪我為什麼說話這麼慢～

和他在電話的對話，１刻也不敢怠慢．．．但今天我久久才吐出數個字回答他的問題。

對～我在所有人的眼中都係很幼稚～

我的行為令人生厭．．．．．．

對不起．．．．我現在只懂說對不起．．．．．

你說過你介意～所以我不應該公開你的名。。‧‧

問題出現係我度，係我自己唔懂得去坦白自己既感覺。

我真係唔想分開，但係你心意已決，我再說些什麼也是徒然。

明知你唔會再同番我１齊．．．．但我會等．．．．．

＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊＊

今天ｂｉｏ　ｔｅｓｔ～我成績是全班第１～但我卻沒有半點快樂的感覺．．．．

人地問我點解要咁努力讀書～唔通我真係咁鐘意讀？

我話：我只係想取得某ｄ成就，讓人地留意到我，讚我。

或者ｃ先生講得ａｒｍ～我真係好似１個缺乏父愛的女仔～

我無時無刻都要人關心要人錫＞＜問題．．．永遠都係出係我度。



漆黑中。。‧‧
　　我要笑．．．．
　　　　要勇敢地笑．．．

分手也許不是１件大事：：
　　明天一覺睡醒＊
會好過１點嗎”？

>>November 17, 2004 at 6:15:27 PM GMT+8