2009 年 6 月 2 日 星期二 【晴】

發作神經.......

點解...........

wht ever been done has been done

learn from the mistakes and try not to repeat it

>>June 4, 2009 at 3:48:59 AM GMT+8

2009 年 6 月 1 日 星期一 【晴】

quoted from Mimi Tanner's newsletter

Accepting a Breakup - Denial, Bargaining, Anger,
and other Icky Stages

"When a relationship doesn't go the way you want it to,
the stages of accepting this terminal diagnosis can
be a exTREEEMly similar to the familiar stages that
people go through when faced with other life-threatening
diagnoses. As you probably know, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-
Ross introduced the world to the 5 stages of grief:
denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
This has been really helpful to millions of people.

I also can't think of these without thinking of
Dustin Hoffman playing Lenny Bruce doing a monologue
on this topic... saying it sounds like the name of
a law firm... "Anger, Denial, Bargaining, Depression,
and Acceptance, how can I help you?"

But nonetheless - these stages ARE very real in
many, many life situations - especially the kind
that we DON'T want to happen to us.

The order is not set in stone. I personally don't
find that anger comes first. I go with Denial and
Bargaining. I think many other women are the same.

And that's where we get ourselves into trouble,
because we are trying to literally revive a romance
that is really, really dead.

Denial is when you don't even want to believe that
you can't be in touch with this person any more.
That's when you might break my advice and contact
someone who is not contacting you. OUCH.

Bargaining is when you spend your own time and
mental energy trying to think of ways it can still
work. The brighter you are, the harder you fall in
this one...

Then when you hit Depression, that's when you're
starting to feel like there is nothing you can
do to change this dude's mind WHATsoever, because
it's been a one-sided relationship.

That could be because you showed your hand and
overwhelmed the guy with more than he needed to
handle.

Before you hit the Anger stage, take heart, and
most of all, take care of yourself.

After all, you owe it to yourself to be happy
and to give yourself all the love and understanding
that you would give to a best friend. I can't
emphasize that enough.

So sit down with yourself and think about what
makes YOU happy - and then go do that.

Take care of YOU when you're going through a
relationship hurt, because you will ALWAYS have
your relationship with yourself.

Give yourself the appreciation that HE is not
giving you - because really, you can't count
on the OTHER. Love is all about trying to get
affirmation from an OTHER. Sometimes that can
really suck. You know you're wonderful, but
with the OTHERs, it takes jumping through a
lot of social hoops to get to the point
where they know you're wonderful.

The very best way you can protect yourself
from these matters of the heart is to feel
good about yourself and be strong inside
so that are ready for what life brings
you - ready, meaning, able to fact any
situation with confidence - and bravado
if necessary.

Don't allow any relationship situation to
make you feel intimidated - that is a sign
that someone else is crossing the line, in
which case you have remedies to get them
to back down or back off.

Start your every day with getting in touch
with your heart and your potential and/or
your history of accomplishment.

Don't chase after men - wait for the ones
who care enough to come after you. Spend
the same energy that you would spend thinking
about a man who's not calling you - on working
on yourself. You have plenty to do every day
to live your life and make it the best it can
be."


他要我叫他回來

他才會回來

而我真的叫不出口

在各不相讓的情況下

看來事情將會就這樣完結.......

有點可惜

但我真的不希望他回來是因為我叫才回來

也有可能他只是耍我

根本不會回來

也有可能他從來也在香港

也有可能他希望 secure a few nos of birds 才 worth the tix

太多可能性.....



今天晚上跟 b 出了來

他很 skinny, short n ugly

但超級 humorous

得知我工作上的消息

他逗我開心了一整晚

讓我整晚笑不嚨嘴

他真的很搞笑


謝謝你喔 :)

>>June 3, 2009 at 2:03:06 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 31 日 星期日 【晴】

最近非常 enjoy being feminine 和 girly

非常喜歡跟男性一塊兒 (無論是 flirt 的還是普通朋友)

不知是因為發姣還是因為喜歡上打扮

最近瘋狂購物

繼 sogo 的三個袋

昨天的兩雙鞋後

今天又買了一雙鞋和 join 了一個很貴的 facial package


買夠了

短期內不許再買東西!!!!!!!!!!!


基本打扮用的

都已經夠有餘了吧!

就用 existing 的來 mix and match

不要再買新的東西了!


@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

quoted from Mirabelle Summers's newsletter

When he doesn't give chase

"Why don't we get right to it and tackle the question that's on a
lot of women's minds: "Is he just NOT that into me?"

I don't have to tell you what a DOOZY that can be to so many girls
out there. No woman in the dating game is spared from this
enduring question - chances are YOU or someone you know has dealt
with this mind-wrenching scenario in the past.

Tell me if this doesn't ring any bells: you meet a seemingly great
guy, go out with him and the sparks flying back and forth between
you two are just CRAZY.

You've never felt a rush like this before, and just when you think
it couldn't be any more picture-perfect, he kisses you right
outside your door and bid him a good night.

Bliss doesn't get any better than this! Before you know it, your
head's spinning out of control and you're off floating in the
clouds.

Then, for the next two weeks, he falls off the face of the Earth
and gives you NO proof of life. Any or all of the following
thoughts start to cloud your mind:

"Why hasn't he called back?" (A timeless classic!)

"Did I say or do something to creep him out?"

"I brushed my teeth, didn't I?"

"Has he been abducted by aliens??"

The quickness of your ascent in to La-La land is only exceeded by
the speed of your nosedive into bleak reality.

Suddenly, you don't feel so great anymore.

So now you're caught up in a vortex of swirling, frenzied thoughts,
endlessly trying to dissect the last night you saw each other.
Feelings of insecurity start creeping into your brain as you
desperately grapple with the possible reasons behind his sudden
sabbatical into a parallel universe.

Then you feel that URGE to call him to see how he's doing. Maybe
all he needs is a little chat to jog his memory. Why don't you
ring him and say, "Hey remember me? I'm the hapless girl you
locked lips with the other week. Why don't we hang out sometime?"

Ok, so maybe I'm kidding about that last part, but tell me you
didn't feel COMPELLED to call him. You KNOW you wanted to!

But seriously, there's nothing wrong about feeling that impulse.
It's also perfectly normal to rationalize a perfectly IRRATIONAL
behavior (well, to us girls anyway) and make up your own
explanations as to why he's gone MIA.

Sorry to be the cold splash of water on your face, but the plain
truth is that he simply ISN'T serious about pursuing you. Goodbye,
end of story.

As the old saying goes, where there's a will, there's a way.

When a guy is really into the girl, he'll EXHAUST ALL means to
contact her. He'll stop at nothing to get in touch, whether it's a
simple text message, an email, or a smoke signal for crying loud!

Heck, it wouldn't matter if he was abducted by an extremist group
and whisked away to another country. When they broadcast his
hostage video on the evening news, he'll shout at the camera, "Hey
babe, remember me? Anyway, I really had a great night the other
week. Sorry I haven't called you back, I'm just...a bit tied up at
the moment..."

Ok, so maybe the last example was a little overboard, but you catch
my drift, right?

The point is that I want you to WAKE UP and smell the subterfuge!
Whatever 'connection' you felt between you two is irrelevant.

It doesn't make a difference whether he gave you a nice little peck
on the cheek or if you invited him up for "a cup of coffee". If
he's interested, no force in this world could stop him from
tracking you down, like a bounty hunter after his prey.

Women put themselves through a heap of unneeded grief by treating a
man's actions as some garbled message that needs to be deciphered.
Let me translate for you. He's not giving you an ambiguous message
here. It's pretty darn clear that he's given up the chase.

There's really nothing complicated about that.

Take his male buddies for instance. When a guy rings up one of his
friends to invite him over for poker night and the said buddy
doesn't show up, he's not going to analyze the situation or cry to
the rest of the gang about it.

He'll simply assume that his friend had other priorities and that
would be the end of it. So why should you think any differently
about a guy who doesn't call back, especially since we live in a
time where it's so EASY to reach out and touch someone??

So my advice to you is to RESIST the temptation to leave him a
hundred messages on his machine or hound him with a stream of
voicemails. Think about how that bears on your SELF-RESPECT and
value as a woman.

It's a classic mistake to run around after a guy who clearly makes
NO effort to follow up with you on that "great night" you had AGES
ago. While you're at it, don't waste your time sitting around with
your girlfriends to talk about his no-show like it was a discussion
on existentialism.

PLEASE, you're better off getting some backlogged work done or
watching that movie you've been dying to see.

When you're dealing with Mr. Invisible, all you really have to look
at is what he's doing and NOT what he's saying. His inability to
call you back is a CLEAR sign that he's not ready to get into
anything serious right now.

Even if you feel like you were played like a puppet, it's really
nothing personal. So it doesn't really matter if he makes
half-hearted verbal excuses of how he really likes you, but is
"just caught up in a lot of things right now".

He's just sugarcoating his aversion towards commitment, which
really has little to do with who you are as a person. It's no
one's fault but his own if he's just leading you on and wants to
keep his options open at the same time.

That's a FAR CRY from a guy who can't get you out of his brain and
tells you how the minutes seem like hours when you're not together.
He'll probably joke around, asking you what you slipped him that's
caused him NOT to stop thinking about you.

On the other hand, Mr. No-Show was probably just caught up in the
moment and now has reconsidered where he stands with you...but
doesn't know how to tell you up front.

In his mind, his "mixed signals" are actually his way of telling
you how un-mixed he is about not sticking around.

As for you, be the sassy woman that you are by not treating it like
your personal apocalypse. A confident woman isn't going to pack
her bags for pityville just because some guy wasn't mature enough
to appreciate what a prize she is.

Besides, there are so many fish out there, and all it really takes
to find that quality catch is the RIGHT BAIT. What we're referring
to of course, is your undeniable attractiveness that allows you to
find other guys who are just dying to meet you.

You should check this out if you want to know more about reeling
them in:

http://www.000relationships.com/wantmore/

The truth is that quality men don't respond to direct actions.
Rather, they come around to NO contact from your side. That's why
you really don't have to do anything if a guy truly wants to be
with you.

There's no need for the drama, manipulation or incessant hemming
and hawing over his no-call, no-show act. What we should do
instead is to face reality squarely in the face and come to terms
with the fact that there will be times when we need to MOVE ON.

This sounds like a tall order, but it's merely standard procedure
for women who've broken the mold of thought that tells us to just
wait around and keep our fingers crossed.

Hello? It's the twenty-first century for the love of Pete! We
live in a time where it's not a crime to be the self-sufficient
woman you want to be.

Sure, we can be the aggressive go-getters when it comes to work.
There's nothing like a competitive attitude to drive us into going
after the success you yearn for in the professional world.

Your love life is a different matter though. Don't get caught up
in a hazy fantasy world where your invisible Prince Charming will
just come into the picture as quickly as he had vanished weeks ago.

Unless he's a closet superhero and doesn't want his enemies knowing
about you, there's really NO EXCUSE for him NOT to pursue you.

Getting used to this kind of thinking is actually liberating in
many ways. You'll be free from a clingy attitude or agonizing
yourself over him.

Remember: an empowered woman doesn't have to waste her time trying
to drop hints on the elusive man, nor does she have to keep poking
him in the ribs in the hopes of picking up where you left off.

If he REALLY wants to do that, he'll be willing to meet you WAY
PAST halfway. The quality man knows his DREAMGIRL doesn't deserve
anything less."

頗贊成她的說法

如果一位男孩喜歡你

你不需做什麼

他自然也會不停約你

如果他不喜歡

你幾 chur 也沒用

所以

他要是真的喜歡我

不用我叫

也自然會回來

他說要我叫他回來

他才有一個 'reason' 回來

我想這只不過是因為他不夠喜歡我

或者他從來只是 player

根本沒想過見面

所以

我決定 take it easy

enjoy dating with those in real life first

and let him take his time

no rush mate

but at the same time

i am not going to wait

:)

>>June 1, 2009 at 1:41:14 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 30 日 星期六 【晴】

quoted from terry macdonald's newsletter

tips for good listening:

1) Indicate interest by occasionally saying, "You know, I never
thought of it that way" or "Wow, how did that make you feel?" This
not only lets aguy know you're actually listening, but you think
he's special, too. More important, it forges the connection you're
going for: It makes it clear that you "get" him.

Resist the impulse to dive in and veer the conversation away to your
own similar experiences. Let him talk himself out. You talk later!

2) Look him in the right eye. Yes, the right eye. Since you can only
look him in one eye at a time, meet the right one to further promote an
emotional connection. (The most successful commercial real estate
developer in my area, a student of human behavior, says he uses this
technique because "I want people to like me." Judging by his
prominence in the community, it clearly works.)

3) If it feels natural, gently touch his wrist in a non-threatening
way.

4)To help keep your mind on what he's saying, picture it. We humans
can be extremely monkey-minded. Stay focused.

>>May 31, 2009 at 1:59:55 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 29 日 星期五 【晴】

今天是身心靈活動日

haha

下午跟 s 去了做 yoga 和 bollywood style dance

晚上去了朋友家催眠, 練習 thai massage 和 lap dance

不過 lap dance 練習徹底失敗

我想我需要一個可以 flirt 的男性朋友來練.......

女的太 embarrass 了.......

-_-


謝謝朋友的 dinner

和交託你的身心給我

哈哈哈.......

thanks for your trust

:)

>>May 31, 2009 at 10:45:10 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 28 日 星期四 【晴】

跟 sp 去了吃飯看戲

上星期第一次見面

對這個人第一印象是沒有 feel

不過可以做朋友

但那晚他送了我回家加了分

而上次飯後和閒談間知道我喜歡意大利菜

他猜到我喜歡吃 cheese

又好像加了分

今天跟他出去

他原來訂了位吃意大利菜

席間說起溜冰

原來他以前是打 ice hockey 的

又加了幾分



不過他很坦白說他不是一個 faithful 的人

很明顯是一個 player

也認為這世界所有男人都是這樣的

所以我覺得我跟他根本不會 work

他問我可否見多些.....

唔........

我想是可以的

但我是否把自己放在一個太 risky 的 position 呢?

他提議下次見面去溜冰..........

>>May 30, 2009 at 3:44:12 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 27 日 星期三 【晴】

對上一次溜冰

該是超過十年

今天跟 d,s,v,m,a 去

居然還懂站

而且仍可以向前行

哈哈哈哈


很開心呢 :)


突然想學溜冰

:)



今天下午 dr. anglea yung 打電話給我

說希望開中草藥給花花

叫我留意她的行為

- 口腔有沒有乾

- 腰骨及腳有沒有問題, 行路有沒有腳痛跡像

- 舌頭顏色, 粉紅還是偏紅

- 喝多少水

- 喜歡暖和濕還是乾和冷的環境, 哪種環境呼吸比較順

- 小便多少, 什麼顏色



雖然我不知道這位醫生的醫術怎樣

但她的舉止很像師父

而師父是一個很聰明的人

所以可能因為這樣對這位醫生起了一份莫明的信心

加上這位醫生很細心

感覺到她是真心喜歡和關心小動物

所以很喜歡她



突然想起 ardent wong 說

wholistic approach 其中一個概念是

人和動物總會一死

但如何能讓他們的痛苦減到最低呢

可能不能醫治

但也盡量不讓他們受苦

他說自然療法跟傳統西醫的療法的其中一個分別是

用自然療法的人會死得比較突然比較快

病情會突然好轉

然後過一兩天便會死去

但西方醫學會待比較久

人會越來越衰弱

然後慢慢死去



我想我是一個比較怪的人

我會 weight motivation 很重

當然醫術也會看

但 motivation 和有沒有 heart 佔很重要的一部份

我想如果是我病的話

我會選擇自然療法

寧願醫不好比較舒服的死去

也不願意經歷化療那些過程

生存

可能不是我的最高 priority

哈哈哈



花花的想法又有誰知道呢?

>>May 29, 2009 at 6:32:49 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 26 日 星期二 【晴】

今天帶花花去看天后寵物醫院的 dr. angela yung

她非常有心機

consultation 問了很久

極力推介



她說雖然花花的肝有一個影

但其他 x ray 和 symptom 所反映的都是 asthma 的症狀

她說花花兩年前所經歷的影響了她的情緒

而我們一家人於兩年前所經歷的也對花花有強烈的影響

dr yung 說動物對 energy 很敏感

人發生甚麼事

動物是會 '受哂'的

所以身邊的事情對她會有重大影響

她說花花的肝反映了情緒問題

因為肝是跟情緒有密切關係的

所以花花的不開心

終於於兩年後今日演變成身體上的疾病

她開了花藥療劑調理花花的情緒

另外也開西藥處理花花的 asthma 毛病

另外她聽到花花的心有些雜音

說遲些可去一個心臟專科醫生檢查

看看是否心臟衰竭

嫲嫲也有心臟衰竭的呢


她問我 animal communicator rosina 說了甚麼

告訴她以後

她在笑

我問她 energy healling 是否真的有效

她沒有直接回答

但她又好像相信 energy


晚上給花花花藥

由於是 liquid

要滴進她的口

她居然之後吐口水把藥吐出

好搞笑


花花喔

希望氣促快些好吧!

>>May 27, 2009 at 1:23:30 PM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 25 日 星期一 【晴】

改變了

以前寫日記是無軀束的暢所欲言

近來寫的日記心裡會 aware 有個受眾

寫的時候軀謹了

這樣下去沒意思

盡量嘗試回復以往的寫法吧!



喜歡了一個 net fd

他是壞人的機會率高於一百

曾經嘗試 call off

轉個頭又做不到........

他在玩我嗎?

不行

既然暫時做不到 total cut off

要學習 play it light n casual

看到 mimi tanner's news letter 說

"You can't let love in when you're acting according to
a script.

You can't let love in when you're busy protecting yourself
against the eventual day when he's going to leave you.

You can't let love in when you're trying hard not to care
about him too much."

到底我該全面自我保護

還是豁出去

expect the worst n be vulnerable?

這是 'committment' 的其中一個定義嗎?

我有 commitment phobia 嗎?

還是我只是 act rationally 而已?



要學習取得 balance

not be exclusive

light hearted n enjoy the dating with those in my real life

最近認識的這位 player s/p

他的言談有時候跟這位 net fd 有點相似

這證明他們也是同類嗎?



很多問號

很多 uncertainty

這次讓對方作決定和 control relationship 的去向

enjoy beling the follower

能做到嗎?

>>May 26, 2009 at 2:52:30 AM GMT+8

2009 年 5 月 24 日 星期日 【晴】

quoted from Mirabelle Summers's newsletter

"Attractiveness is about living your life in a way that keeps you BALANCED all around and FOCUSED on who you are as an individual.

It's a basic habit of managing your daily life in a certain way that NATURALLY makes you drop-dead gorgeous.

This is why people say that "real beauty is effortless". It boils down to having something beneath your physical exterior that's worth a man's FULL ATTENTION.

And that kind of attitude arises from being a REAL person who acts out of SINCERITY, and not manipulation. Ask yourself the following:
- Are you doing the things in your life because it adds fulfillment to your existence? Or merely to create a false illusion for other people's approval?

- Are you truly passionate about your life? Are you engaged with your job, your hobbies and interpersonal affairs? Or are they hollow excuses to be alive for another day?

- Do you want to be in a relationship with a man because you're missing something in your life, or because you truly care about him and want him to feel good?

- Do you want to attract men simply to get the attention and validation that YOU should be providing for yourself?

Based on these questions, you can surmise if you're living your life in a way that naturally makes you attractive. Or are you driven to be attractive merely to add meaning to your daily existence?

In other words, you'll need to have a fulfilling life you're passionate about BEFORE you can be truly irresistible. Working towards a meaningful life is the key to a successful relationship, and NOT the other way around.

Can you imagine how it is for a guy to deal with a woman who's after him out of DESPERATON? Instead of having a girl who's truly interested in him as a person, what he has is someone who's basically looking for an EMOTIONAL BABYSITTER.

Yikes!

The truth is that no one else can fill that void but YOU. A relationship fails when it becomes the absolute center of a person's life, when in fact it should be the opposite.


Today, I'd like you tell yourself a few empowering beliefs. Take it to heart and make it your personal mantra if you must. Don't just think you are, KNOW you are.

Now, repeat after me:

"I am already a WHOLE person on my own, and I am not damaged or missing in any shape or form. It is within MY POWER to forge a balanced life and give equal focus to all aspects of my daily affairs. I am fully aware that I alone must take the responsibility of making my life work for ME."

What I want you to realize right NOW is that a truly irresistible woman gets her winning and undeniably attractive attitude from the way she treats her LIFE. She knows that her love life is NOT the only thing worth living for, so she makes sure that ALL areas of her affairs are covered.

Whether it's your professional, personal or social life in question, the smart girl places equal importance on those things because in the end, that approach to living makes her an interesting woman that men CAN'T bear NOT to know.

When you excel at your job, have a lot of friends and are engaged in a hobby or personal cause, that gives you plenty of attractiveness to go around!

Of course, there's nothing wrong with keeping yourself fit, fresh, and neat. Just remember to have something going for you other than just your looks. Beauty is dime a dozen, but a woman with real
substance is a lot harder to come by.

So I tell you: don't just be a pretty face; strive to develop your network of family, friends and colleagues to make you plenty happy even if you aren't seeing anyone at the moment. A woman who is confident with the kickass life she's made for herself, it makes her a mature woman most suitable to be in a functional and stable relationship."

>>May 25, 2009 at 2:14:09 AM GMT+8