2003 年 7 月 22 日 星期二 【晴】

感謝主！如果昨日唔係有Linda同我一起祈禱，我一定會一直下陷．愁到唔識起返身．今日‘糊’完了吧～只小知道自己要點做，人生要點行　－　與主同行！

*********************************************************************

我知道錢捆綁住好多人．．．但真係好想比佢地知道一點：個視線唔好放在錢到放得咁重．有些人成日話冇錢冇錢，但佢地平時又去玩，去娛樂自己．其實都唔知用左幾多錢啦．打扮一吓，買下野．．．小費都變大費了，本來有都攪到冇錢.

爭氣啦～　好嗎！？交學費，比錢屋企～　窮人唔係好有骨氣的嗎？您要讀書，實有好多朋友仔支持您的，但您有心去讀嗎，您會專心嗎？會努力嗎？讀唔好書唔係您錯，因為您的天賦可能不在哪裡．

但您要在困境中生存呀！！！！！！！！！！

I know we are living in a fallen world~ but survive pls, can you? You are letting yourself fall into this trap. Jackie… You have hundreds of friends supporting you and making you UP again and again. Yet you are falling over and over, suffering all through just because of one guy. I know falling in love with someone has no reason but you just FEEL it~ However, you’ve got your freedom for your life~ as you like it! Hanging around, making yourself angry repeatedly~ what for? Are you fulfilling your wants? Come on…has he not been hurting you deeply?

God gives us freedom to choose where to go, who to rule over our minds~ Somehow, if you choose him, you will praise him 4-ever, with gratitude and grateful towards him.

I think you don’t understand how God changes me, but neither do I understand how Jerry changes you. I don’t like comparing, but see to our differences, it’s not who is being lucky or vice versa… but to whom we will be surrendered.

７月２４日
十二點前做好了靈修．感謝主的保守呀！頭先打左電話比Derek，都想知佢有咩問題，等我可以準備一下明天點去回應佢埋，點知．．．祈主保守他吧．８粒鍾後又要返學了，好似唔想返咁～～　星期四又會正常一點，只小唔使排練．

係呀，前日我得到了資料，十二月的機票貴都嘔！！！我同馮生講過機票的事，以經濟為原則，我決定坐馬來西亞機返．不過他總是要‘大路’為原則．

保留一年的機票：
１）＄1568 (馬來西亞機)
１２：３０飛吉隆坡(馬來西亞的首都)，停２.５小時，下午一時到到香港．

２）＄2024 (台灣)
飛台灣，停一晚，免費住宿，飛澳門

３）＄2109 （澳航）
直行返香港

４）＄2269 (國泰)
直行返香港

５）＄比以上的貴（星航）
直行返香港

我好想由香港返，澳門走，不過唯一的新加坡航空只有３５日機票．



>>July 24, 2003 at 12:02:46 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 22 日 星期二 【晴】

It was 3am when I was awaken~~ then 4 and 5 am... waking and sleeping in between.
I dated Alice at 8am this morning in the tram station, so that we could walk to the rehearsal venue - The Melba Hall.
I was late, and so do her, even more late than me!!!!!!!!!!! I used to walk very fast and this morning,
it was raining, I was afraid that we will be late, so I walked fast.
Oh well~~ she was having difficulty to catch up with my footsteps....
I am in a situation to walk slowly but taking the risk of late and walking as fast as I could to be on time~~

It's 2 by now, hungry~~

>>July 23, 2003 at 4:12:29 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 21 日 星期一 【晴】

記得二００二年十月二十二日有咩事嗎？

又一個月的二十二日了．．．

唔，Ａlice仔昨日買了藥吃～～好返好多了．Edna呢，話比我知有好小好小的事，不過大事小事都好．都攪左佢唔開心，我都擔心了吧．沒有積奇的消息，大概都冇咩事卦．

三人行的時候，先知到先自己做錯了幾樣野：
1） 以為Ｆ在Ｃ的後面．我場音樂會有分坐位，我要左Ｃ同Ｆ行．我仲話比人知是但坐哪兩行．因為他們在一起的．唔知點解會有這個concept，明明Ｃ後面仲有Ｄ同Ｅ．．．

2） 另外，星期一哪天，我出了幾廿萬個meeting notice（exaggerated）SMS & e-mail啦～　開學生會，三人行．多媒體組又開會啦同私人的約會啦．．．點知有缺陷的，地點冇講清楚，打錯野呀．．．

完美主意．．．
自己想點就點，想有好成績，想靈命提升，想任何野都做得好好好好．．．但主呢．．．衪不是想這樣的．．．只有衪是完美！我好努力做好自己的本份，做得唔好，做唔到，攪到自己好唔開心．主有衪的方式和時間．

撞曬得喇！！！好彩放學時返了教會找幫忙～～


>>July 23, 2003 at 4:01:06 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 19 日 星期六 【晴】

昨日的崇拜，牧師講到我們要放時間去follow up哪些未信主的朋友．如果係咁，這一個方案足夠back up我留係澳門三個月！一個月的時間，我可以做得到嗎？傳褔音．．．

功課多到嘔呀！排練又排到好累呢，好不容易先做好一些數學，讀了經文，這幾天都離開了主．．．中午同Alice仔行supermarket，買了個＄２cake一起在garden吃．我好自然咁入了講‘主耶穌’的話題，見佢冇乜野，我都不斷咁講，哈哈．後來佢話好開心可以一起吃午餐．明白的．．．平時一個人吃，好lonely架！


>>July 21, 2003 at 2:02:21 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 17 日 星期四 【晴】

返左學五日了，我比以前更加努力，今個學期要努力以赴！
因為上個學期好懶散呀～
雖然Exam個成績唔錯，不過我覺得自己都冇盡力，
今個學期要努力以赴！

時間又真係好快過的呢．大家可以開始倒數我回澳的日子　－　十一月十日．哪天下午兩點會有Economics Exam，我估七點倒，乜都完曬架喇．晚上出機場，Thomas仔話１／２個鍾就可以由市中心去到機場．．．

三個月．．．我有好多好多理由去推番大家我唔留下來：交空屋租，冇工開，返到澳門，又不是‘玩’，飲下野，所謂的娛樂．．．都要錢．其實我在澳洲會用小一些錢吧．無聊吧．．．三個月．．．我都好唔捨得架，想‘睇’住積奇仔，安仔啦，又想幫下手做野．．．唉～　仲好想等埋佢地信主先走．．．我就話十一月先返，但主要回來的日子也好快到吧！

其實，事在人為．．．有冇人會講同我講聲：“您唔好走啦．．．”

不過有些不對似的．我昨日決定十一月走，我空堂時就去了訂機票．點知好多人呀，等左好奈，我冇等下去了，因為仲有堂上．今日呢，下午經過另一間Flight Center，我去問下機票＄同轉機的事（想由澳門機場走）．點知佢地電腦的網絡死曬，佢地都做唔到野．兩次了．．．咁coincidence？

唔知主是否唔想我哪時回去呢！？

我第９堂去了音樂室同阿Sam & Alice 排練，下星期五出音樂會了～　我過左５分鍾先上去上第十堂．Late了～～　我好不容易先由一樓上到八樓，就見到Benny（點解係‘Ｂ’唔係‘Ｐ’！？）點都好啦，佢停止我去上堂，同我講左好多野．佢話佢本來會resign．．．因為佢身為學生會的人唔去學生會攪的Dinner & Dance Party．撞鬼，學生會攪又冇話學生會的人一定要去．．．我都唔去啦！因為冇衫冇錢，冇我的朋友仔去．這一個晚會，同一般撒撒攪的grad din一樣，都係穿到好顛！不過都好開心佢咁專重我這個小小文書，比我知到這事．全個學生會，全世界都唔喜歡Benny 架，不過我唔係，仲好睇好佢．叻仔一個！

今晚冇水果吃呀～～　明天要去多次街市．平時我星期五放學會去架．今日放左學見到電腦室有電腦冇人用，就上一上網先走．點知見到積奇仔，又忍不住講多一些，又send埋封電郵比Linda．．．

當時見到Daniel，就等埋佢先走．佢呀．．．激死我了．Still visiting website when I was waiting for him, then I phoned Jackie, he was still there. He then went to his locker to pack his things. I waited him once again coz he needed to go to the bathroom (Australian way to say ‘toilet’). During that time, 2 lifts has gone!

去到街市，５：５０了，只有2 stores 仲開，但佢地都清緊場了．我買了小小野咋，買唔到水果．．．

大家過得辛苦嗎？有好多煩惱嗎．．．問題呢．．．
From: Warren. R. Transformed by trouble The Purpose Driven Life, 2002, 193.)
Jesus warned us that we would have problems in the world. No one is immune to pain or insulated from suffering, and no one gets to skate through life problem-free. Life is a series of problems. Every time you solve one, another is waiting to take its place. Not all of them are big, but all are significant in God’s growth process for you. God uses problems to draw closer to himself.



>>July 21, 2003 at 2:00:49 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 17 日 星期四 【晴】

e幾日都好累，時間又好唔夠，都冇係屋企寫日記呢～～
昨日七點返了教會上堂，路上見到 Yo Yo呀，我次次幫Linda做野，佢都係到架．
今日上完堂，佢地 sell books ，佢又幫手了！我開左學，幫唔到！
係啦，上完堂，阿力同我返屋企，
佢話至從上年行garden後（七個月１．．．）
都冇乜同我傾計了．
好開心，因為可share比佢知我信主後的事～～～

>>July 18, 2003 at 12:18:18 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 16 日 星期三 【晴】

I wake up with a painful shoulder! A very painful one :(

Alice gets skin allergy :( She asked me to accompany her to the nurse yesterday when we were about to finish the rehearsal. Well, I ignored her and later found myself regretting... I was concerned about my attendance in the English Class and the things that I will be missed but not puting any LOVE on her. How can I work out to be a truly Christian !? Reflect....

Well, this morning I have my piano lesson, Juliano also has his lesson. Both of us do not want to have the lessons... I opened the door, and let him in, he stood aside and so the teacher Catherine Day walked in before Juliano and me holding open the door. She praised my scarf~ Yes, it was made by Jackie...everyone says it's NICE :) ~~~

>>July 17, 2003 at 2:23:50 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 14 日 星期一 【晴】

開返學的笫二日．今日的時間做得好過昨日，不過都係好 tight 呀．今晚都要返教會上堂．昨晚９點幾又睡了．好多謝媽媽的來電，使我十二點醒返．因為想溫習呀．今日堂堂都精精神神似的．電腦堂開始累，不過死都頂住，結果都冇miss任何野～上完這堂去左買咖啡呀，後來見到Maggie~估唔到，佢吸煙架．．．唉～

>>July 16, 2003 at 5:00:29 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 13 日 星期日 【晴】


好開心收到家姐寄比我的郵包，有好多野架，哈哈～～，不過佢寄了幾包咖啡，好可惜海關沒收了！點解ｗｏ～～明知咖啡係我的致愛黎架．．．　：（　討厭！我返澳門一定要飲返～～

開左學了～　昨晚單單整理好我的課本，都攪了好奈，十二點睡了．今日仲攪野，六點三十分都仲未起身，結果我７：４５吃早餐，８：２２先出門口，冇返去彈琴．
是但啦，哈哈．．．雖然正式只有上了兩堂，都好累了．

Looking forward…
17 July 03
My tutorial student, as well as my good friend, Michelle’s Birthday~~

25 July 03
Long Fung’s Drama Club has a concert! Remember that I have acted in the Butterfly Lover’s last year ma? Around this time… Bell, Jack, Penny & Dog… did Zaku came also? I think we met him in McDonald after that~~ That was my first real drama on stage and maybe my last…

August… Dad, my sister, Alice, Penny and Ms Shelly Grace’s birthday o~~ $$$$$$$$..... >.<


>>July 16, 2003 at 4:59:31 AM GMT+8

2003 年 7 月 12 日 星期六 【晴】

今早好趕去左排練，點知十二點先開始，我早到左兩個鍾！！！

>>July 14, 2003 at 1:37:04 AM GMT+8